MTV’s Real World Philadelphia to feature August 24 casting special, premiere September 7 - Reality TV World

I don’t watch The Real World anymore, but when is MTV going to decide “enough is enough”? If they’ve already crossed off every “cool city” and scanned down the piece of paper far enough to realize some disgruntled production assistant actually typed “Philadelphia” on the list, then the time has come to wrap it up.

MTV has successfully located seven strangers to live in a house who, ironically enough, appear to be the same seven strangers they’ve cast the prior fourteen seasons. Follow along at home.

These strangers include:

* Karamo - Token Black Guy, but MTV has assured us “angry” is not an adjective in Karamo’s vocabulary. Well, if it’s not now, it sure as hell will be by the fourth episode. So as to pre-empt any confusion, Karamo was not the runner-up on last season’s The Apprentice. That was Kwame.
* Landon - Sensitive Midwestern Hick Jock
* Melanie - Party Girl. She was a U.C. Santa Cruz banana slug…can’t be that much of a party girl. “If you follow your heart, you’ll be happy.” Oh Melanie-san, you are so young…so innocent…so unknowing in the ways of the world.
* MJ - Southern Good ‘Ol Boy Jock. I know, for half a second I was all excited that maybe they tossed MJ from North Shore into the house but, no dice.
* Sarah - Party Girl II, most attracted to “bad boys who are witty, independent, athletic and a challenge.” Doesn’t sound like any of the “bad boys” I knew but what-evvvvvvvvvver.
* Shavonda - Finger Snappin’ Token Black Chick Who Likes Jocks. She’s putting herself through college so I’ve got to give her credit for that, but if she’s also “the life of the party” and “loves attention from guys,” those personality attributes generally will outweigh the desire to go to class. Plus…didn’t she skip out of school to go do this show? My point exactly.
* Willie - Gay Puerto Rican American. Criminy, let’s just call him Pedro and be done with it, okay? I promise…I’ll refrain from any inappropriate “Slick Willie” jokes.

The housemates will also be participating in yet another “job,” this time at a community outreach program, planning and building a playground for a local care center for troubled youth. Hmm. Philanthropy. Project. Build. Sounds like something for Kwame! Oh wait…sorry, wrong show.