Yes, I’m almost done…but I have to talk about ER in order to complete my trifecta of Thursday night television programming.

Dr. Dumbass as Chief Resident? Pray that Kirsten didn’t go to County General.

Hey…look what happens when you have a lot of money, no desire to teach and a television contract coming to an end…you get…tenure!

After watching two hours of The O.C., I started worrying when I saw two bottles of wine in front of Susan. Granted, one was probably for hubbyman but still. Good for Susan in standing up to Kerry but, I have to ask…whatever happened to Kerry’s kid? Go home, woman.

Abby and Jake…gigantic family party? I never really thought that was Abby’s scene, but I wanted to bitch-slap the ninnies who were talking to Abby about how they knew so-and-so who had her first child at 35, 40, 65…whatthefreakever. How rude.

And oh my…could Doogie be having that epiphany where he realizes, “Dammmmmmmmn…I guess this really is more than just a day job?” I think I saw a glimmer of compassion in his eyes…or maybe it was just a reflection off the lamp in our living room.

And, Carter’s still talking to Kem in the evenings. Blech. Greene at least went out in Hawaii with a brain tumor. Ross fled to Seattle. Elizabeth went…hell, I don’t know where she went. Romano was smushed by a helicopter. And for Carter, the one character who’s been on the show the longest…this is all you’ve got? Kem? For shame.

The UberHusband was on a roll last night with Luka…all discombobulated regarding how Luka was shaving…or, not shaving as the case may be. Seriously. The guy’s entire hands were covered with shaving cream, yet he only had it on one side of his face. What was he doing? It was as if he’d either (a) tried to bludgeon the can of shaving cream to atone for his years of tortured souldom or (b) he was in Miami with Seth Cohen and tried to intervene when Bob Jones University Guy was showing Seth how things are done in the S.C., bitch.

The UberHusband demonstrated to me this morning how men are really supposed to apply shaving cream to their face…sorry kids, no photo of that.

And by the way, if you’re dating and have to go see a couple’s counselor, take your cue from Harry Connick Jr. and just call the whole thing off.