I won’t even bother telling ya’ll what the last couple of weeks have been like. If I haven’t been blogging, there’s been a reason.

Today has been nuts, but I’m oddly satisfied with myself right now. You know that scene in You’ve Got Mail when Tom Hanks says…

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if I could pass all my zingers to you and then I would never behave badly and you could behave badly all the time and we’d both be happy? On the other hand, I must warn you that when you finally have the pleasure of saying the thing you mean to say at the moment you mean to say it, remorse inevitably follows.

I disgree with you there, pal. And, I gleefully speak from experience.

So I go in to get my allergy shots today, went to get my allergy shots, and after I got my injections was trapped in the waiting room with a loud, boisterous mom and her five children, all under the age of 7 or 8 - two were still in diapers. There’s a TV on in the waiting room, and That 70’s Show was on. I forgot a book, so I was sort of stuck watching Fez and Eric.

On the other side of the room, Loud, Boisterous Mom starts yelling about how they’re a strict no-TV household, and she’s telling her kids not to look at the TV. For some reason, all I could think at that point was, “Don’t go towards the light, Carole Annnnnnnnnnnnne!”

To distract them, she begins talking IN HER TRADEMARK LOUD VOICE ABOUT HER FRIEND’S CANCER AND THE FASCINATING DETAILS OF CHEMOTHERAPY AND ALL THAT IMPLIES.

Cancer. Vomiting, hair loss, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.

Dandy.

Eventually, all of her kids get this glazed-over look in their eyes so Loud, Boisterous Mom gets up, declares the TV show is “not kid-friendly”, and turns the TV off.

Then…the wheels in my mouth started turning…

Snarkwife: “Hey, I was watching that.”
Loud, Boisterous Mom: “I’m sorry, but that show isn’t appropriate for my kids to watch”
Snarkwife: “Well, it’s not appropriate to discuss your friend’s vomiting due to chemo in front of other people, either. You can’t dictate what happens in public just because your kids are out in it.”

I was about to continue with, “You’re not the boss of me!” but just then…the timer went off indicating my allergy shot waiting period was over. With that I looked at Loud, Boisterous Mom, said, “Have a nice day!” and walked out the door.

This is not generally-accepted behavior for me. Usually I’ll just suck it up and ignore boors like this chick because the world is inundated with idiots but, I got a full night’s sleep last night and was feeling great…first night in literally years I haven’t woken up at least a couple of times.

All I have to say is, thanks, Ambien!

And nope…still no remorse.