We had some fun holiday drama last night here at Casa de Snark. Let me preface this by saying, Cookie and Daisy love, love, love my mom…Cookie, especially. My mom came down to Sacramento to visit me the day after I got Cookie (10 years and 7 days ago), so it would seem likely she’d have a pretty strong bond with her.

They spent lots of time with my mom when she lived here in Dallas for a few years, and now we only see Mom a couple times a year, but both dogs get eerily excited and giddy and they pace and growl and their ears perk up when I say the word, “Grandma.”

Last night, at…ahem…7:40 p.m., the UPS guy showed up to deliver Package 1 of 2 from my mom, with Christmas presents. We’re assuming Package 2 of 2 is CU’s box…since the first one had stuff for the dogs and three gifts for me…CU wasn’t that naughty this past year. Anyhoo, I unpacked the gifts and put them under the tree. Immediately, both Cookie and Daisy began sniffing one gift in particular like drug dogs in Miami who had hit the Colombian mother lode. Obviously, the paper must have smelled like Mom.

“Awww, how cute…I should get a video of this to send to Mom…would probably make her cry,” I said. Not more than sixty seconds after I said that, a fight broke out between Cookie and Daisy. A fight. Imagine the NBA brawl from last week…that’s pretty close to the level we had to break up. I almost started laughing though, when CU had contained Cookie, because her mouth was still going full-tilt, with full toothitude. I’m sure she was still growling smack at Daisy with some sort of “Bring it on!” action.

Speaking of full toothitude, CU’s arm came between Cookie and, I assume, what she thought was Daisy. You know those photos when people are bitten by a snake, and you see four distinct tooth marks? This was better, because there were only three…Cookie’s not quite as fierce since she had one of her fangs removed a couple of years ago.

After the altercation, we calmed everyone down…distracted them for a few minutes, then Cookie decided she was going to break Grandma out of Gift Jail. She kept scratching at the gift…and scratching…and scratching…willing us to release Grandma so she could kiss her to death. I finally did catch it on video, while talking to Mom and regaling her with stories about how her granddogs got into a raging pawfight over her.

Silly dogs. After about three more minutes of scratching, we finally distracted Cookie for good with a doggie treat. Food always trumps Grandma.