I Think I’d Make It…About Ninety Seconds: Do you have what it takes to quit complaining for 21 days? “They” say it takes that long for a behavior to become a habit. I ordered one of the cool purple bracelets today, and it should be here in 6 weeks. Cripes…they couldn’t offer expedited shipping?

Heather: 2, RoboLeg: 0: Charity case activist Heather Mills stunned America by doing a backwards walkover (isn’t that what Locke was denied on Lost?) in a green pantsuit with tassels. Is it wrong to be annoyed that a woman who is older than me and has one less natural leg is a better dancer than me? Billy Ray Cyrus, you should be ashamed she upstaged you the way she did. Hey, I don’t have the bracelet yet.

Good Morning America, Doing What It Does Best…Pander To The Stay-At-Home Mommy Contingent: This morning, the show dropped this bombshell on an unsuspecting America which, I suspect, was having a Good Morning:

The National Institutes of Health study, which tracked 1,364 children since birth, determined that preschool kids who spent time in day care were more likely to be reported for problem behavior later on in life by their sixth-grade teachers. But it also found that fifth-graders who went to day care had better vocabulary scores.

I’m sorry…but did anyone notice there are several years between preschool and the sixth grade? Anyone else care to wager a guess as to what else could cause “problem behavior” to increase during those 5-6 years? How about dismissive parenting, no boundaries, and a lack of consequences for poor behavior? I listened to the whole segment, and there’s a half-second portion of the show where…unless you were paying reallyclose attention…you’d miss it. Want to know what that portion said? It said the number of sixth graders displaying behavior issues was slightly higher amongst those who had been in day care. Uh huh. That’s what I thought.

Attention, All Military Wives: Support your troops by making an appointment to gather around the television next Monday, to make fun of the silly girls who think being married to a military man is all bulging biceps and starched uniforms! Alternately, every time they say there’s nothing like a man in uniform…drink!