So in my Fafarazzi Dancing With the Stars Fantasy League, at the last minute I switched out Helio for Floyd. Big mistake. Big. Why can’t I simply trust my gut? I now know better, and also understand the rules of Fafa TV leagues a bit better.

Thoughts on last night’s beefcake-fest…

• Helio is perfect…even if I’m now sort-of forced to call him Jean Girard.
• Len wisely refrained from telling Wayne Newton he reminded Len of himself as a young man.
• CU and I are at odds with each other over who has the hotter girl crush - me with Edyta, and him with Julianne.
• Speaking of Edyta, YAY for finally geting a partner who is physically compatible with her.
• What is it with this show and all the invalids? Robo-Leg from last season, Old Man Cuban’s hip replacement, and then Cameron had some sort of disease as a child which left his legs in braces for several months? Where’s that girl with the webbed toes from The Bachelor on Monday? She’d fit right in.

The guys were just fantastic last night…even Floyd, once Karina executed her pout-and-leave-the-room act with standard precision, which always seems to melt her “jackassy” partners to a pool of ballroom goo. I don’t get that. Floyd has a lot of…spirit…he just needs to figure out how to dance. Funny thing, I think I said something similar about Emmitt Smith awhile back.

Going home tonight: Josie Moran. How do I know this? Well, when Tom Bergeron was talking about someone going home on the results show, the camera focused squarely on Ms. Moran’s face. Then, when earlier in the show Tom talked about the stress of the ladies and “someone may go home,” the camera cut to the ladies lined up in their chairs, with Jennie Garth reaching over Josie to grab Sabrina’s hand. It was so awkward, we had to back it up and watch again. You can see the exact moment when Josie mistakenly thinks all three ladies are going to join hands in solidarity but no, she quickly realizes her gaffe and puts her hands back in her lap. Ouch.

**Confidential to Samantha Harris: I need you to come back to the show. As much as I used to snark on you and your spokesmodel tendencies, I’m getting sick of hearing Drew Lachey compare all of his scores to this season’s scores thus far. His exchange with Cheryl Burke last night which ended with, “I think Wayne might be the best partner I’ve ever had,” made me want to throw a shoe at the TV. Please come back. You can even bring the baby. No one will mind.**