I was watching Urban Cowboy earlier this week on VH1 Classic, and was thinking about how great the soundtrack to that movie was. Now granted, it was slightly before my time but my mom owned it, and played it about eleven gajillion times, so now it’s stuck in my memory.

The obvious choices (Saturday Night Fever, Grease, Purple Rain, Footloose, Dirty Dancing) aside, what other soundtracks have received the Snarkwife Seal of Approval?

• Urban Cowboy - I can’t hear Boz Scaggs’s “Look What You’ve Done to Me” without thinking of Bud cheating on Sissy with that oil baron’s daughter: “Daddy’s in oil. And all that implies.”
• That Thing You Do! - I loved everything on this soundtrack except for that insipid Diane Dane song…she was such a tart, flirting with Jimmy the way she did! For shame!
• Singles - Was there a defining soundtrack for my generation? If it wasn’t this one, it’s the one below.
• Reality Bites - Goodness gracious, whatever happened to The Juliana Hatfield 3?
• The Bodyguard - I think I literally, wore this CD out…and the cassette tape I dubbed it to so I could listen to it in my car.
• Sideways - Technically a score versus a soundtrack, but you can’t tell me the music in that movie isn’t great.
• The Commitments - I just rediscovered this one, and downloaded all the songs from iTunes. I had the CD back from when the movie originally came out, but didn’t seem to have it anymore. Regardless, remember when Andrew Strong was dubbed The Next Big Thing?
• When Harry Met Sally - “Harry who? I don’t know who he is, but he sure is hot!“
• Tin Cup - This wasn’t exactly a great movie, but it was definitely a movie which was saved by its soundtrack - which always makes me smile. If only there had been a song titled, “The One Where Don Johnson Gets That Smug Smirked Wiped Off His Face.”
• Hope Floats - Another one of those “average movie, great soundtrack” entries…Trisha Yearwood’s “To Make You Feel My Love” hooked me, and the rest of the songs kept me coming back.
• The Little Mermaid - I know just enough French from “Les Poissons” to probably get me laughed out of Paris…thanks, Disney!
• Almost Famous - Have you seen this movie? Seriously…you need to. It’s one of Capt. UberHusband’s all-time faves, and the soundtrack is a fantastic compilation of early 70s classic rock. I didn’t know all the words to “Tiny Dancer” until I saw this movie.
• Say Anything - If you were a young woman in 1989, you had this cassette tape. If you were a young man in 1989, if you were smart, you blared it from your boombox in front of your girlfriend’s house.

It was tough to narrow this one down to just 13. Juno barely missed the cut…but the movie and soundtrack just came out, and I really can’t with good faith put it on my list of all-time fave soundtracks just because I’m enjoying it right this second. Honorable mentions go to Elizabethtown, American Graffiti (again, a little before my time), and St. Elmo’s Fire.

Which soundtracks pop into your head?

• ”Lost”: Preseason cheat sheet | Lost | Doc Jensen | TV | Entertainment Weekly | 1
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• Weblog Tools Collection » Blog Archive » WordPress Theme Releases for 1 / 30
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• SAG Scoop: Jim-Pam Nuptials, Office/30 Rock Crossover and More!
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• 30 Things to Do to Keep From Getting Bored Out of Your Skull at Work
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• Introducing The Candy Heart Generator - Despair.com

Yeah so…nothing is wrong with the furnace.

The heating guy just left and it turns out that our furnace has some safety mechanism in place where if it tries to ignite three times and is unsuccessful, it quits trying. Apparently, that happened last night…and this phenomenon is not uncommon (say that three times fast…phenomenon is not uncommonon) after significant windstorms, which we also experienced yesterday and last night.

Turns out, all I had to do was turn it off…and turn it back on…to reset it. Well, I did turn it off at 7 AM, when I decided I didn’t want cold air blowing into my house all day…but it took an HVAC technician to turn it back on for me and make everything all better. Oh well. While he was up in the attic he inspected our unit and declared it fit for combat. He also praised our meticulous filter…yeah, we’re good about that…changing it out often, what with my allergies and all.

On his way out he said, “I’m not sure why I didn’t tell you to try turning it off and back on this morning when you first called.” I replied with a smile, “Because then you wouldn’t have made $90.”

My thoughts are shifting from the cold to the warm…more specifically, the island on Lost. I was looking for a cool “X hours until Lost returns” countdown clock or ticker, but couldn’t find anything good so…here we are.

ABC is re-airing last season’s finale tonight and I’m sorry, but I can’t believe that was last May. I still remember sitting in my living room, with tears rolling down my face as I watched Charlie meet his watery grave. Oy. Then I had the same “WTF?” moment the rest of America had when Jack pleaded with Kate at the end to go back to the island…that they had to go back. There’s no way that was eight months ago.

Nevertheless, I’m ready for some new TV. When your Tivo is full of nothing but The Millionaire Matchmaker, Dr. Phil and Jon & Kate Plus Eight (I love that show, because I can’t stand Kate)…it’s time for some new network programming.

So which is worse…having your heater go out in January, or having your air conditioner go out in July?

Discuss.

By the way…it’s Adelle’s birthday…and I’ve never been more grateful for the gloves she knitted for me than I am right now. Because of her, only half of my hands are cold. Happy Birthday, Adelle!

When Daisy got me up at 4 AM to go outside, I thought it seemed rather…cold in the house. When she got me up again at 6:30 AM I thought it still seemed rather…cold. I checked our handy-dandy weather station and sure enough - it was cold in the house, to the tune of 57 degrees. Fanfreakingtastic.

I called CU (naturally, he’s not here), climbed up the ladder to see if we had hot or cold air coming out of our vents (cold), crawled up into the attic to see if the pilot light was on (couldn’t tell), then came back downstairs to find a local York heating system authorized serviceperson. He’ll be here this afternoon. When I told him I worked out of my house, he said he’d try to get here sooner.

In the meantime, I have the fireplace on and the dogs are bundled up in blankets. The fireplace has raised the temperature two degrees in here. Much more, and I’m going to have to change into shorts! Ha! Sorry…the sense of humor is always the first thing to freeze. If it gets too bad, I’ll pack up the dogs and drive around for awhile.

Part of me thinks this is God’s way of making me work today…the faster my fingers type…the warmer I’ll stay…right?

• Survivor All Star Starting a Record Label - Music News : People.com
  (tags: survivor television tv reality)
• New Kids On The Block Preview a New Song - New Kids on the Block, Music News : People.com

You see this book? I bought it at Hobby Lobby yesterday because now that I’m nearly done with CU’s scarf (durn thing’s taking a while to dry from the blocking…oh well, he’s out of town anyway), I figured I’d jump into the Exciting World of Dishcloths.

I know the knitting purists out there hate crochet, but my grandma has been crocheting dishcloths for years…and I think every member of the family gets at least one every Christmas. With her getting on in age, I was thinking it would be fun if I could continue in that tradition.

I bought this book specifically because it says “12 FUN & EASY DESIGNS” in the bottom corner. I figure I can do “easy” - I’ve mastered the single and double crochet after all, and have made about a dozen afghans over the years. It’s time for me to challenge myself and move to the next level, right? Well, turns out a full six out of the 12 FUN & EASY DESIGNS kicked my apparently crochet-challenged ass.

After work yesterday I sat down with my hooks, my yarn, and an excitement about trying something new. Two hours later I had a headache, no progress, and a disarming feeling of dread.

Seriously, these things were hard! The book is supposed to teach me new stitches with each pattern…and beautiful those patterns are, but the beginnings of my dishcloths looked like something a first-grader could have done with the same amount of yarn and a couple of plastic forks.

Eventually I gave up and started knitting instead…figured I’d try to beat the crochet beast into submission again tonight. I will not admit defeat.

From: Prof. Marketing
Subject: customer analysis feedback
Date: January 28, 2008 11:34:53 PM CST
To: Stacy

Hi Stacy,

I’ve reviewed your customer analysis and I have to say it is one of the finest I’ve received. Quality of both content and presentation are clear, your observations and integrations are insightful and you’ve exceeded my expectations – much like Ritz-Carlton.

I appreciate the in-depth focus on the emotional elements of the Ritz’s service strategy and the identification of the impact of the “democratization of wealth.”

You earned full credit for this assignment.

Best wishes,
Prof. Marketing

Next step…the competitor analysis!

The good news is, we’ll still get a rebate…the bad news is, it will likely go to offsetting our tax bill. Way to help us stimulate the economy!

Today’s Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit Word ‘o the Day…

Bschool:

Business school; ground zero for the hatching and learning of vast amounts of corporate bullshit, which is then used to identify fellow Bschool attendees and make those who aren’t feel stupid or just confused; actually a very long, expensive cocktail party where people go to make connections and buy the right to say, “At Stanford/Wharton/Princeton/Harvard…”

When I graduate, I am so going to do that: “At Stanford/Wharton/Princeton/Harvard, I analyzed the advantages and challenges of qualitative versus quantitative research designs, ultimately determining the coding and interpretation cost varies with the interview method.”

Seriously - I’m going to drop the names of all four schools while reading the notes from my online mini-lecture. That’ll impress everyone.

So CU and I were at Target today. As we were walking away from the humidifier aisle…dejected because we can’t seem to find one that works in this metropolis, we happened upon a mom yammering away on her cell phone, while her toddler child wiggled around in the cart.

As we walked past her she barked, “If that cup spills one more time, I’m going to beat you right here in the middle of the store.”

Well then. My eyes got about THIS big, and then I asked CU if he’d stand by and cheer me on while I proceeded to take her down and beat her right there in the middle of the store. He said yes. Awww.

I suspect she’d put up a bit of a fight, but I have ways of making her submit.

There - fulfilled my requirement.

TGIF, folks…TGIF.

As I’m sure you haven’t noticed (heh), I’ve been pretty tight-lipped about school so far this semester. This isn’t intentional, it’s just that…wait for it…there isn’t anything to complain about!

By the same token, there hasn’t been a whole heck of a lot to talk about in general. I only have one “group” assignment - for my Market Research class - and that’s a round-robin debate tournament on marketing ethics which lasts about two weeks.

The one fun thing…I’ve managed to pick a subject I can use for both my strategic marketing and market research classes, inspired by last weekend’s visit to the Ritz-Carlton. On the strategy side I have five deliverables over the next ten weeks, encompassing a customer analysis, competitor analysis, market analysis, and environmental analysis - and the Big Kahuna, an industry analysis. Oddly, this sounds exactly like what I did last semester in my marketing management class…and it is, just with the added boost of a strategic approach thrown in for flair.

(more…)

Awhile back I did a “Top 10 ways my grad program is different than my undergrad program post” - so this is a bit recycled, but expanded.

• The proliferation of the internet. How did I make it through the early 90s without it? I’m able to do more research on a project in two hours now than I could do then in two weeks.
• No wine coolers within a mile and a half.
• The semesters go by a lot faster…I have no idea why that is.
• Better guy in my bed.
• My car has all its original hubcaps.
• There’s no need to sell books back at the end of the term to pay my electric bill.
• I’ll probably actually use this degree (See: “What are you going to do with a Poli Sci degree?“).
• I can afford to drink two glasses of wine during asinine project team conference calls.
• I don’t have to write my papers on this thing.
• Less poufy hair.
• No credit card debt!
• No microfiche!
• Better GPA…a lot better.

WordCamp Dallas is coming to, well, Frisco at the end of March. No one would come if it was called WordCamp Frisco.

Event Details

Mark your calendars and plan on being in Frisco, Texas on March 29th & 30th for the largest gathering of WordPress bloggers, podcasters, designers, programmers and aficionados that Big D has ever seen.

Our WordCamp will be hosted by the wonderful city of Frisco in their fantastic, state-of-the-art city council chamber complete with cushioned, theater-style seating, plenty of power connections, WiFi, and A/V systems. We’ll also be providing coffee and munchies both mornings, lunch both days and t-shirts to take home (or to wear one or both days!)

Enough outlets and WiFi for 300 people to live blog for two days…outstanding! I was thinking about going, but I have finals that next week - although $20 for the shirt is enticing.

Heath Ledger is Dead - TMZ.com

and all I got was this stupid “Do Not Disturb” sign!” –Cookie

Oh my God, we had the best time this weekend. I hesitate to say “had” because really, we’re still in the midst of our anniversary weekend - we’re just at home for the last third. We’ve never stayed at a Ritz-Carlton…and I’m happy we were able to procure a decent rate…well, decent that is, until they tacked on the occupancy tax. I forgot how expensive the hotel taxes are here in Dallas.

Anyhoo…we’ve stayed at a couple of Four Seasons hotels and a handful of other “luxury”-type hotels, but this place spoiled us. Literally. Let me list out a few ways…

• Upon check-in, we asked if there was any way we could get upgraded - and they told us they had already upgraded us to a suite. Sweet!
• The staff sent up an anniversary card and chocolates after they found out we were there for our anniversary. Sweets!
• There was a TV in the bathroom mirror. A TV. In the bathroom mirror.
• Our original room had access to the club lounge, so we still had that - and the club lounge provided us with five food presentations a day which included continental breakfast, a light lunch presentation, afternoon tea, evening cocktails (complimentary) and late-evening desserts. My one regret - I didn’t get a picture of the clock made out of chocolate in the club lounge. Actually, I didn’t get any pictures of the club lounge. Oh well. Will have to go back, I guess.
• We took our books down to Fearing’s Bar last night around 5:30, and were treated to complimentary tastings of Fearing’s margaritas and freshly-made guacamole. As someone who gags and practically convulses at the smell of tequila, I didn’t want to bother with the margarita but…it was really good. Really good. And I’m not just saying that because it was complimentary.

(more…)

There’s no harm in recycling posts if they’re topical, right? If you ignore the Army and hurricane references, it could have been written yesterday!

Reduce Your Winter Heating Bills the Snarkwife Way

Lifted from Why Not - Right?

We’re taking two laptops with us on our Romantic Anniversary Weekend, which in theory would make us uncool lightweight nerds. Unfortunately, just because we’re whisking ourselves away for a couple of days of fun, and I’m taking Monday off from work…that doesn’t mean I can push off school until Tuesday. So, I need a laptop.

My #1 choice is of course, my Mac, but the University of Dallas - in it’s infinite wisdom - has chosen to make some of its online classroom lectures available only in Internet Explorer so we have to take CU’s Iraqtop. Heh. I just made that up. I need to go see if he thinks that’s as funny as I do.

I don’t get Gene Simmons. Obviously he must care more about being right and preserving his own ego than helping little kids with AIDS, or else he wouldn’t have gotten his ass fired on Celebrity Apprentice last night. Seriously. I can’t stand Omarosa as much as the next person…but she had no business being in the boardroom, nor did Jennie Finch. What was Trump supposed to do?

In adjoining time-slot news, I’ve said it more than a few times, but ER is better than Grey’s Anatomy this season. The writing is better, the medical cases are more compelling…and frankly, I’d rather watch Neela and Morris trade quips than McSteamy and Hahn any day of the week. I don’t care about any of the couples or hookups on Grey’s anymore even though, Sam and Gates flirting back and forth is teetering on the just-plain-dumb. Just because men and women work together in the same place, it doesn’t mean the writers have to pair up every possible combination.

Favorite scene? At the end…”Sky…Lucien. How’s the water?”

Mmm…tasty!

Appetizer
What is your favorite beverage?

Coke Zero.

Soup
Name 3 things that are on your computer desk at home or work.

We’ll go with my office desk…I have the hard drive guts from an external HD which went kablooey a few weeks ago, my vacation countdown clock (currently set to 229 days), and a to-do list for today on the back of yesterday’s page from my Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit page-a-day calendar.

Salad
On a scale of 1-10 (with 10 being highest), how honest do you think you are?

Probably…an 8?

Main Course
If you could change the name of one city in the world, what would you rename it and why?

Ahahaha…I actually had this conversation with one of my college roommates 15 years ago. I’d change the name of Mar Vista in California to something else. There’s no sea nearby, and there sure as heck isn’t any view of the sea.

Dessert
What stresses you out? What calms you down?

Right now, people who say they “work hard” stress me out. What does that mean? Just because you work hard, that doesn’t mean you’re getting anything accomplished. What calms me down…playing Diner Dash and lately, knitting CU’s scarf.

Police Blotter - Daily Nexus

And to answer your burning question…no, I never behaved like this…although I did have to bail a friend out of jail once for his public performance.

I do find the date of the article funny, though…Y2K. Monday wasn’t January 17. The author must have been drunk when he/she wrote it.

On this day seven years ago, I was getting ready to be a bride…a cold, frozen, rather regrettably sleeveless January bride. This seems like a good time to list out for you…

Thirteen Reasons Capt. UberHusband Is the Sexiest Man Alive:

(more…)

Hillary Clinton to Speak at UCSB - Daily Nexus

“Marking her first visit since 1992…” Huh? I must have missed that day at school. Then again, I wasn’t really the “rally at Storke Plaza” kind of girl unless it involved the Thunderdome, UNLV and a basketball game that night.

Oh…if you’re wondering what I thought about last night’s American Idol, all you have to do is read my post from last season’s premiere and replace “Minniesohta” with “Philliedelphia” and “Navy intelligence analyst” with “Freak in a mankini top who got his chest waxed on national TV.”

We flipped channels about halfway in, although we’ll watch tonight so we can make fun of everyone in Dallas. We like doing that.

About a month ago, I got this brilliant thought in my head - what if, for our “wool” anniversary, I knitted Capt. UberHusband a scarf? After all, he’ll be going to some cold locales before Spring comes…and it would give me a chance to dust off my knitting skills. A month should be enough to finish a little ‘ol scarf, right?

In theory, this would be true. What I failed to take into account was the fact that Capt. UberHusband would be off work the last two weeks of 2007, and would be at home. You can’t knit a scarf for someone who’s always around. Well you can, he’ll just know about it. So I decided…I would just take every second of free time I had during the workday once he went back to work after the new year…and knit! Two and a half weeks should be enough to finish a little ‘ol scarf, right?

(more…)

See ya, Netflix!

Today @ PC World Macworld Announcement 3: iTunes Movie Rentals

Because I don’t want my blog to turn into one of “those” blogs where all I do is complain and/or outline what I bought at Target at lunch, yet I need to contribute my obligatory Blog365 post…I went digging into the archives to find out what I was doing on previous fifteenth days of January.

Turns out I was MIA in 2006…oh that’s right, I was on a blog hiatus. But, for the other two years…

• 2007: So Much For the “Yukon Yeller”
• 2005: A classic “Dear Snarky” - You’ll have to excuse the formatting…the post came over from another source kicking and screaming when I switched domains.

Yeah, so it’s been one of those days. I had to drive half an hour to Presby of Plano for a followup to My Very First Mammogram last month (don’t worry, everything’s good) which took about three hours total…then I had to run up to my orthopedist’s office because that stupid bursitis in my hip doesn’t seem to be resolving itself (don’t worry, anti-inflammatories and physical therapy should make everything good) and now there’s this huge firestorm at work…ugh.

But, I had to blog today. Those are the rules. I’ll sacrifice precious lunch-eating time though, to bring up the topic of Jenninate on last night’s episode of The Amazing Race. Who’d have thought Thai food came from Taiwan? Maybe Miss Teen South Carolina was right, and there really are people out there who can’t afford maps…or whatever hooey it was she said regarding maps.

In case you’ve ever wondered what Capt. UberHusband and Snarkwife do on their anniversaries…well this year, we’re headed downtown for a romantic weekend which will include, but is not limited to, wine tasting, dog-free merriment and…textbook reading. Hey, the semester doesn’t stop just because we’re doing something fun. The capstone will be a romantic en-suite dinner on Sunday evening while we watch the season finale of The Amazing Race! We rock!

So here we are…Day 13 of Blog365…and I don’t think I’ve blogged this much since the month CU and I found out he’d be going to Iraq. I had a lot to say those first two weeks.

Anyhoo, as I was cruising the blogosphere and expanding my bloghorizons I stumbled across Smiler and her fantastic Blog365 badges. The one I originally had was dull, and IMO not very Snarkwife-worthy. This one is better, though. Much better.

We’re enjoing our weekend…I’m all caught up for my classes (two days in…what a feat!), so we’re eating guacamole and watching the Giants/Cowboys game. I suppose by sheer geography I’m supposed to root for “the ‘Boys” but really…I only want them to win so I can watch Jessica Simpson freeze her ass off in Green Bay next weekend. Oh wait, that’s wrong…Green Bay will be coming here. Never mind.

Lifted from Sweet Bippy:

What Snarkwife Means

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don’t always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don’t have as much going for them as you do. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You are usually the best at everything … you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You’re always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can’t handle you. You’re very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you’re likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don’t spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you’re snobby or aloof, but you’re just too deep in thought to pay attention to them. You are very charming… dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts. You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it. You have the power to rule the world. Let’s hope you’re a benevolent dictator! You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It’s easy to get you excited… which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don’t stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings. You are able to be a foundation for other people… but you still know how to have fun. Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

Seen all over the blogosphere…the numbers speak for themselves:

65% Mitt Romney
59% Hillary Clinton
58% Bill Richardson
58% Chris Dodd
57% John McCain
57% Barack Obama
56% John Edwards
55% Fred Thompson
53% Joe Biden
50% Tom Tancredo
49% Ron Paul
47% Mike Huckabee
47% Rudy Giuliani
44% Dennis Kucinich
41% Mike Gravel

2008 Presidential Candidate Matching Quiz

Spotted over at Why Not - Right?

The Recipe For Snarkwife

3 parts Allure 2 parts Boldness 1 part Courage Splash of Laughter Finish off with an olive

A first! Snow falls in Baghdad –USATODAY.COM

Let’s get this out of the way…all you knitting aficionados out there…do you really put the poofy ball thing on knitted caps on the top of the knitted cap before you’re done knitting it? That bugged me all through the final few minutes of last night’s Grey’s Anatomy. I dunno, that just seems like a “finishing” sort of thing.

Does anyone care there aren’t any more original episodes of this show in the pipeline? Did anyone else besides me want to put Izzie Stevens through a meat grinder and feed her to the wild animals roaming around McDreamy’s McAwesome McProperty? Finally…but most importantly…was The Faith Healer storyline schlocky and jump-the-sharky? I mean really…Bailey’s son is healed…just like that? Too bad The Faith Healer can’t go to Meredith’s house…although at this point it would probably take six years to fix her.

(more…)

Appetizer
What is your middle name? Would you change any of your names if you could? If so, what would you like to be called?

My middle name is Ann…and I don’t think I’d change any of my names. When I was a teenager I wanted to change how my first name was spelled, but I don’t think I ever really wanted it to be different.

Soup
If you were a fashion designer, which fabrics, colors, and styles would you probably use the most?

I’d probably use cotton and linen…in colors like white, khaki, pink, light blue, navy…that sort of thing. I guess it would be “resort” style?

(more…)

Ugh. Time to start school again…here are the assignments for my Market Research class:

I’m torn between doing my actual research project on wine stores & wine bistros in the northern Collin County area, or celebrity fantasy leagues. Please oh please Business School Gods…don’t let me get stuck with idiot teams this semester. I beg of you. Gracias.

Dear Time Warner,

I’ve noticed in the past few weeks that the number of spam emails which make it to my inbox has substantially increased.

While I understand my email client can filter junk mail (which it does swimmingly, BTW), I also depend on you as my ISP to protect me from salacious e-morons who want me to use Adobe Akrobat, ask if 8 incches is Enough 4 me (actually, just one ‘c’ is enough for me), and would like me to view my bill online. Oh wait, that last one is from AT&T.

(more…)

As I’ve watched our old fence be demolished and hauled away, only to observe a brand, spanking new fence being erected in its place, I began to think about all of the other things I’ve been more than happy to say, “Sayonara” to…and geez, the list was longer than I thought it would be:

1. My first car, an incredibly unsexy 1985 Nissan 200SX: I got it my third year of college, and managed to put 90k miles on it over the next five years. When I finally unloaded it, coughing and sputtering, on the fine folks at Carmichael Honda…they gave me $700 in pity money for it. I then drove away in my sexy 1996 Honda Civic.

2. College: Seriously, I was so happy to get out of college. I graduated in 1993, and while my contemporaries were modifying their schedules in 1992 so they wouldn’t be able to graduate the next year and instead could “ride out the recession” within the safe confines of university life, I wanted nothing more but to get the hell out. I remember “adults” telling me that “the real world” was hard, but all I could think was how I didn’t care if I worked eight hours a day as long as I’d get my evenings and weekends free. Now look where I am. On a related note, The Powers That Be have changed the name of my old dorm…now that I am sad to see go.

(more…)

I’m playing around with SimpleLife…trying to see if I can get it to integrate with all of my various feeds. So far, it’s about 50/50 - my Last.FM, blog, and de.licio.us links are updating…but Twitter is MIA and my Google Reader updates are being tagged as de.licio.us links.

Will play around a bit more…then…sigh…ask for help.

Fence Replacement 6 - Day 1

Originally uploaded by snarkwife

It’s a sad day as an adult when you realize your idea of fun is replacing your fence.

While I’m thrilled to death about replacing our aging, dilapidated, and leaning fence…I’m not terribly excited about having our backyard exposed to all the neighbors for a couple of days.

I’m thinking one way to lessen my anxiety would be to sit outside on our patio at night and shine flashlights into the eyes of all the folks driving down our alleyway towards us…after all, they can’t see what I don’t let them see…right?

• New Mac ad: Referee
• McDonald’s coffee bars to take on Starbucks: report
• Dr. Phil criticized for going all Dr. Phil on Britney’s ass
• Golden Globe awards reduced to a news conference, Obama & Huckabee to host. Kidding.
• Colbert & Stewart…back on the air:

I don’t say this very often…but I had a great weekend. Now, that’s not to say I generally have bad weekends, it’s just that usually we’re busy doing something (or feel like we should be busy doing something) and then I turn around and it’s Sunday night…and I kind of feel like I got ripped off in terms of weekend fun. With school starting back up again next weekend, I need to pull it together and get into a good routine and invest in cultivating better habits.

Having said that…

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• Record temperatures predicted for Dallas-Fort Worth, which means we’ll be getting hit with an ice storm in a couple of weeks.
• In related news…swimsuits and shorts are now available at Target! No link, just wanted to report on this from our local store.
• Survivor: Micronesia cast revealed
• Britney Spears in da (Dr. Phil) house!
• Linguists choose ’subprime’ as word of the year

I swear, this isn’t going to be a meme-heavy blog for an entire year…but I’ve seen some fun ones as of late, so why not? Thanks, Hillbilly Mom!

“Were You A Snot-faced Spoiled Brat When You Were Growing Up?”

I can already answer that one for you…no. I knew how to use Kleenex.

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• TV Lookout: highlights for Jan. 6-12
• Actors refuse to cross Golden Globe picket line
• Mother apologizes for ‘Hannah Montana’ hoax…but fails to apologize for those eyebrows.
• America’s most lustful cities
• ‘Surge’ thrown ‘under the bus’ on annual list of banned words

I think we made it about three minutes into Celebrity Apprentice last night before I wanted to rip the legs off every chair in the house and beat our big-screen TV to a digital pulp.

Hello, Omarosa. We meet again.

CU and I discussed…right from the beginning…that The Donald always tells the teams how to win the various challenges while he’s explaining what the challenge is. When you’re standing in the New York Stock Exchange, and The Donald is explaining what commodities are and how YOU, YES YOU, are in fact a commodity, little bells and fireworks should have been going off in everyone’s head.

Turns out, they were…except for in Omarosa’s head, because Omarosa actually thought Team Empresario should use sales skills to sell their hot dogs on New York City’s least lucrative corner (thanks, Carol Alt!). I suspect this had more to do with the fact that Omarosa has no one in her cell phone’s speed dial to call other than the T-Mobile customer service number, and she didn’t want anyone like Marilu Henner one-upping her so early in the game.

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Mmm…tasty!

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“The Jew says to the Muslim — see, I have no idea what they say, because there’s a writers’ strike.” -Jay Leno

After the news buffer at 10 PM, we settled in to critique the Return of the Late Night TV Hosts. By far, Jay Leno was the winner in my book. His monologue was actually very funny, as opposed to David Letterman’s shtick, which should have just come with it’s own news crawl at the bottom with pro-writer, strike-related headlines.

Quite obviously, Letterman’s writing team struck a deal with the union devil because the entire show (or what we saw of it) seemed like nothing but a propaganda platform. After the first half-dozen “jokes” it really began to fall flat for us, so we switched back to Leno. I would have liked to see what Leno did with Emeril…but we went to sleep.

Last night actually provided a truckload of new television. We almost didn’t know what to do with ourselves and had to try to remember how to record two shows at once on the Tivo. We wound up taping Law & Order (which I swear, hasn’t been on in about two years) and Project Runway, then settled in to watch Wife Swap and Supernanny.

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In my quest to blog every day for the next year, I figured I’d better have some regularly scheduled posts to help break up the monotony caused by (a) the writers strike, (b) the upcoming Spring semester, and (c) the biannual writing funk I have fallen into:

With that, I am jumping into the Thursday Thirteen pool…this first one is sort of a gimmee…didn’t really require all that much thought, but it’s topical enough as an inaugural post.

1. Try to floss every day. This sounds lame, but I am getting tired of my dental hygienist getting on me because my gums are inflamed. Plus, it’s just the right thing to do.

2. Slow down…and I don’t mean that in a, “…and smell the roses” sort of way. I mean, literally, slow down so I quit walking into doors or countertops and causing physical harm to myself.

3. Get to the gym at least three days a week…preferably five. This really isn’t a lofty goal, because I used to go every day. Our facility just got all brand-new equipment last week (which we tried out this past Monday…fantastic!), which is incredibly motivational. Plus, I am a heck of a lot happier and amenable when I’m working out regularly.

4. Blog every day.

5. Learn how to make a great mojito…not a good one, but a great one.

6. During school, make sure I read at least one book for fun every month. I remember back during my undergrad days, I went months without reading anything for fun and sadly, when I graduated it took a long time to find reading enjoyable again. I’ve got a fairly good stack of books from Christmas to sift through…because life can’t all be about strategic marketing and market research textbooks.

7. Read my magazines before the next month’s issue arrives. This should be easier now that we’ve let our subscriptions to Food & Wine and Conde Nast Traveler lapse. Women’s Health is an easy read on the bike at the gym, and I generally blow through Everyday With Rachael Ray the day I get it, anyway.

8. Walk the doggies more…even if it seems like Daisy hates every second of it.

9. Work my way through my Netflix queue…the goal is 4 movies a month. I think we have something like 60+ movies in there now…including all those “classics” I’ve never seen like The Godfather.

10. Cultivate a better attitude about my current job. Painful, but necessary.

11. Learn the ins and outs of my camera…seems a waste to have such a powerful little device and not know how to unlock it’s full potential.

12. Do a better job of keeping up with and commenting on my favorite blogs - I’ve already added all of them to Google Reader, so I’m on my way with that one.

13. Scratch the doggies more…and scratch Capt. UberHusband more.

How about you?

I will now read to you from The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit’s 2008 page-a-day calendar…

holiday halo effect: The phenomenon occurring in the days (and often weeks) before and after the company’s observance of a holiday that renders employees virtually incapable of completing any work; the holiday halo effect is always followed by the postholiday clinical depression halo.

Allow me to elaborate…side effects may be experienced while suffering from the holiday halo effect, and may include the following:

• Uncontrollable need to turn on the interior and exterior holiday lights
• Gluttonously eating fifteen pieces of candy at one sitting because the holidays are over, but the candy is still around
• Uncomfortable bulging of the eyeballs, usually after looking at the number on the bathroom scale
• Paranoid loneliness, due to a spouse going back to work after a two-week vacation at home
• More serious cases of the holiday halo effect may experience a temporary loss of consciousness, caused by incoming holiday credit card bills

There is currently no cure for the holiday halo effect. You cannot stop it, you can only hope to contain it.

Little did CU and I know it when we got engaged nearly eight years ago, but picking a January wedding date gives us an excuse to take at least one day off in the weeks following aforementioned holiday halo effect period every year. Along those lines…little did we know that on January 2, 2001 we’d look at each other, blood draining from our faces, and say, “Holy crap! We’re getting married in three weeks!”

Ooh…that reminds me…I need to get cracking on an anniversary gift.

Lifted from Ficken Chingers:

This one’s easy…just head over to your 2007 archives and find the first sentence of the first post you wrote every month.

January

I can’t believe it’s been a week since I last blogged…something strange happened after Christmas, and I sort of forgot to do everything I normally do.

February

So, I had this dream last night…Matt Saracen and Julie Taylor were newlyweds, and were participating in some reality show for just-married folks…So You Think You Can Dance Like A Newlywed Idol.

March

Don’t you hate it when your job gets in the way of your blogging?

April

Well…at least I figured out how to add text to a graphic file.

May

I swear, the world is such a funny place…last night, as storms were barrelling through the area, Dan Henry on Fox 4 News fielded a viewer question wondering if the storm coverage was going to pre-empt American Idol.

June

Capt. UberHusband and I went to see Knocked Up yesterday morning.

July

In case you’ve been wondering where I’ve been, I realize I’ve turned into “that girl”…you know, the one who gets who she thinks has a really cool new boyfriend and then cuts off virtually all contact with her friends.

August

CU and I decided to flip over to CNBC last night at 8 PM to watch the Fast Money MBA Challenge, which pitts MBA students from “top business schools according to the 2007 U.S. News & World Report Top Business Schools ranking” (which incredibly, doesn’t include mine) against each other for cash! prizes!

September

I’m guilty of being one of “those people” who likes to lump teenagers into one group - you know, the self-absorbed mutants who don’t care about anyone except themselves and possibly, a roughly 10-square foot radius around them.

October

Since I opted to help CU with the pantry instead of study…my free time today is sucked up by school work.

November

Last night was really funny.

December