You know it’s a great world we live in when you get to watch two damaged Merediths on one night…nay…within the same hour. It’s an even greater world when you get to watch people do insane things over a shiny object.
Over on The Office we were treated to Meredith getting whacked in the face by Pam’s “Don’t call me Eli” football pass, and then over on Grey’s Anatomy we’re witnesses to Mere being metaphorically whacked in the face by the sight of an unbelievably chipper Derek and Rose. Sakes alive, those two should be in toothpaste commercials.
Then we have something shiny under Stanley’s car on The Office which results in Michael getting a full peanut butter head massage by Dwight (watch out…Bliss will have it on its services menu in a week), and a shiny Sparkle Pager which prompts our Grey’s residents to continue to act like immature, moronic interns. Really? Sparkle Pager?
Bush: Tax rebate checks are on their way – USA Today
What are you doing with yours, assuming you’re getting one? We’re getting a rebate check…but barely.
Our plan is to cash it (or rather, withdraw it since it will be directly deposited to our bank account), stick it into the Fun Fund and then do something really sexy with it for our Hawaii trip in September…like use it to pay for doggie boarding.
Could you go without your computer for a day?
Man, that’s like asking me to go without air…or water…or Twitter.
I was very proud of myself on Tuesday. CU and I were on a brisk 30-minute walk when I declared, “I think we can leave the laptop at home when we go to Chicago this weekend.”
The scary thing though, was CU countered with all sorts of if/then statements like, “Well, if we do need to print something out, then there’s a business center.” When was the last time we ever printed anything on vacation? Um…never. “Well, if we need directions to someplace…then I guess we could call and ask.” It was a weird conversation.
But leaving the computer completely off on May 3? Sadly, I cannot turn my computer off for the whole day. The Summer semester starts on May 3. What if I turn the computer on, print out my syllabi and then immediately turn it back off? Would that count?
Well. I’d like to say it was a big surprise that it was Carly Smithson who went home last night on American Idol, but isn’t that sort of how it goes with this show now?
It happens every season. Ryan stands there with the Bottom Two and you’re thinking, “Well Syesha, you’ll do well on Broadway” and then…wha? Huh? Did Seacrest just say Carly Smithson’s going home?
All I can say is, kudos to the AI producers for finally getting its head out of its collective ass and having the bottom two perform before someone was sent home. I’ve always thought it was exceptionally cruel to have the singer going home sing the song that made them lose. Again.
Hey! Grey’s Anatomy returns tonight! Does anyone care?
“Never stop and then start again”…says the woman whose career has stopped and restarted about half a dozen times in the last twenty years. Anyhoo.
So here’s a conversation between CU and I last night, kicking off Lord Andrew Night on American Idol.
CU: David Archuletta should so sing “Love Changes Everything” from Aspects of Love.
Snarkwife: {blank stare, then pause} You do realize how incredibly gay that just sounded.
But then…Mr. High School Musical Theater couldn’t place Syesha’s “Dreamgirls Sans Roller Skates” rendition of “One Rock ‘n’ Roll Too Many.” HA! Listen to me. What do I know. My musical theater knowledge revolves around the motion picture soundtrack for Chicago (wait, we saw the actual musical too…with Lisa Rinna), watching Legally Blonde on MTV and the 800 times I’ve seen Phantom of the Opera.
Which by the way…how uber-creepy was it when Lord Andrew basically demanded that David Cook fantasize about fantasizing about a 17-year old in the chorus line? “Well, since I’m 25…” was about all I caught of Lord David’s stammering before they cut away. Poor guy. At least he didn’t pick the Dying Diva Cat song…that really would have gotten Lord Andrew’s britches in a bunch.
I saw jelly shoes at DSW Shoes over the weekend. I was perusing the aisles looking for some kicky new Spring sandals and found…a fashion fad from my high school years.
I didn’t know whether to be excited that everything which is old is becoming new (except me), or horrified that Steve Madden has the gall to charge $30 a pair.
So, it’s Earth Day…and I plan on celebrating by filling up my Jeep Grand Cherokee’s 20-gallon gas tank for $65. Ah…it sounds gas-guzzly, but when you factor in the fact that I only fill ‘er up once every three weeks, all of a sudden I’m an conservation goddess!
So. How about those folks over on Dancing With the Stars? My mom called me a couple of weeks ago and said, “So what do you think of the season?” My answer then…as it remains now, is “Eh.” I had that same silly smile on my face during the season premiere that I’ve had every season but once Steve Guttenberg went away and Adam Carrolla unicycled off the show, I’ve felt…surprisingly little.
This isn’t to say I’m hating the show now, or that no one is entertaining me. Jason Taylor has definitely grown on me, and it is great fun watching him and Edyta dance together. Physically, they’re so compatible. Same for Derek and Shannon. But. Shannon isn’t that great of a dancer. She tries really hard, and you can’t help but notice the growing affection between the two (Can you imagine some of those other couples “platonically” tumbling onto each other on the beach at sunset? Mmm hmm.)…but she’s just not all that good.
We snuck out of work early on Friday and went to see Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Figured that was a safe bet, as we’d be able to dodge the Teenage Brigade…they weren’t out of school yet. Ha!
Seriously though, both CU and I thought the movie was great. Perfect casting. Everyone is great…everyone is funny…there’s nothing I enjoy more now than a great adult comedy. This one wasn’t even a gross-out comedy. There are a few references, but it’s nothing that made me blush. And I’ve seen a naked man before, so the vision of Jason Segal in all his nakeditude wasn’t all that shocking.
I’m not really one for detail-by-detail movie reviews, especially when they usually sound like reviews the pros have already written. It’s funny. Me like. You go see. You like, too.
Today is my fourth blogiversary.
I’m celebrating by getting my hair highlighted and reading old recaps of The Amazing Race and one-hit wonders like North Shore, Celebrity Poker Showdown and LAX.
I can’t believe it’s been four years. This also means it’s only seven days until my fourth anniversary with my company, at which time I acquire a coveted extra PTO day. Go me.
Any big plans for the weekend? We’re going to check out Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Ever since we witnessed the media onslaught over Easter weekend in Chicago, we’ve been intrigued.
Funny thing, when we were checking out room rates at the Turtle Bay Resort around this time last year, we remembered a big alert on their website indicating filming of a major motion picture would be taking place…FYI. You know, so your bikini bottom doesn’t get in a wad when you go there for your honeymoon and find out the place is well, the site of major motion picture filming.
So…which shows did the UberSnark household miss last night, due to storm coverage and breaking possible tornado outbreak news from eighty miles away?
- Survivor
- 30 Rock
- The Office
We did manage to watch ER, because the severe threat had passed by then. But, I guess we’ll head over to the NBC website and watch the other shows there. Except for Survivor. Are they showing that on CBS.com? Don’t tell me who went home…don’t want to know.
Now, NBC5i did cut back to regular programming during the last two minutes of The Office. All we saw was Michael and Dwight in front of what looked like a grave. We screamed, “GAH! NO! TURN IT OFF! DON’T WANT TO KNOW!”
Is There Room for Emotions in the Workplace? – Knowledge@Emory
I’d like to get some opinions on this article…because I think that even though women have made great strides in the workplace in the last thirty years, we still have an uphill battle. Sadly, I’ve seen this in my current job and in past jobs…and I expect to encounter it to an even greater degree after I finish…well, my degree.
It has been very easy for me not to take on the “mom” role on the job, because I’m not a mom. Of course, when the author is advising women not take on the “mom” role at work, they’re referring to the nurturing aspect of motherhood.
I was involved in an inter-departmental scuffle one time, and our boss actually told us we were all like her children and we needed to learn how to get along. That would be great, except I couldn’t kick the offending co-worker in the nuts like I could have if he were actually my sibling. Although I have viewed co-workers as petulant children, that’s from the perspective of a responsibility-taking adult, not a mom.
It’s been a strange week.
- Kraft Macaroni & Cheese boxes – that “push in and pull back to open” directive never seems to work the way it is intended.
- Jon & Kate Plus Eight – Why on Earth are they letting their 7-year old daughter get her ears pierced, when she still can’t manage to get her teeth brushed? Gross!
- The writer of the op/ed letter, “Dallas minors raising babies” in the Dallas Morning News. Seriously, if you actually think these situations aren’t apples and…forget oranges, let’s try apples and staplers, then your head isn’t screwed on straight. Right. It’s because those kids are white. Sheesh. This level of ignorance frightens me.
- The fact that Daisy seems to love going for a walk…for about ten minutes. Then she decides the sky is falling and does everything within her power (and resistance of her leash) to get back home. Then once we’re back inside, she’s dying to go out again.
- How Kristy Lee Cook managed to stick around on American Idol until last night.
- Why I can’t play Mesmo’s TV Squares on my PC. Doesn’t work in Firefox, doesn’t work in IE.
- The price of used textbooks. It was nuts nearly twenty years ago, and it still is today. Thank God for Half.com.
- Why my neighbors across the street haven’t cleaned up the dead bird on the sidewalk in front of their house. I see them walk past it at least half a dozen times a day.
- Bloggers who pander to their audiences, and try to sound way cooler than they really are. Why not just be yourself?
- How some of the folks in my MBA program are managing to pass their classes. Please tell me I won’t have to compete with these people for jobs.
- Why one of the neighborhood kids can’t get up five minutes earlier. I’ve watched him literally run for the bus every day this week. He just passed my house.
- Why when I single-click a .csv file on my Mac, 50% of the time it lets me change the file name (which is what I want to do), and the other 50% of the time it launches Excel. That isn’t what I want to do.
- Why I can’t manage to blog more during school. Maybe I need to schedule it in…like a root canal.
When I used to go in for allergy shots twice a week, I used to encounter the most interesting people, with the most interesting stories.
Now that I’ve graduated to the point where I only go in once every three weeks, and Nurse Brandi is kind enough to schedule me when no one else is scheduled (being a long-time patient has its advantages), the stories have become less and less. The last time I went in, I had a “medically significant” reaction which led to a couple of rounds with the nebulizer and my doctor hovering around me like a bee. The point is…now instead of sticking around for 20 minutes after my shots, I have to stay for 30.
What this means is…more opportunity to observe weirdos, especially since it was busy there this morning. Take this woman sitting next to me…we’ll call her Susan because, that’s her name. The TV in the waiting room was on the Today show and the topic was the polygamy raid here in Texas.
Well. She was tsk-ing and making all sorts of screechy and gutteral sounds which pleaded, “Please, someone engage in conversation with me…I don’t want to just say something out loud, but I’ll make just enough noise to where someone will hopefully say something in agreement.”
Of course, I didn’t bite. She did the same thing during the story on Today about last night’s Biggest Loser finale. I wanted to close my book, turn to her, and ask if she was having a reaction to her allergy shot.
You all know CU spent a year in Iraq. Prior to that Jim, one of his best friends, was “reactivated” but was fortunate enough to spend his tour someplace in Missouri – which in some circles is a fate worse than Iraq. Literally, about three days after Jim’s “tour” ended, Seth got his letter in the mail.
We used to joke that Jim was forced to hand over the names and addresses of known accomplices to keep the ranks strong. Then, we joked that his other Army buddy Leo was safe because so much time had passed since CU had gotten back. No way they could still be calling IRR guys up, right?
Well, this morning I found out Leo was called back up to active duty and has to report to Fort Jackson in May. Then he’s off to…who knows. Likely Iraq. To add insult to injury, he got the letter the day before he went to Maui with his girlfriend for a week. At least we found out on the back-end of a fun trip.
The really weird thing…Leo got out of the Army about the same time CU did, so he’s been off active duty…nine years? He’s got a gun-toting job with the US Government now though, so it isn’t like he hasn’t held a firearm in a decade. Odd thing though, we thought he’d had to resign his commission when he took his gun-toting job. Guess not.
I also guess it’s time for me to ask Leo what his favorite TV shows are, and to fire up the DVD ripper. That’s always my contribution to deployment…television shows.
So, Ben’s over at his site posting prom pictures (Hee! Check out the facial hair!) and imploring the rest of us to do so.
So…I went looking for my prom picture. If I do recall, I threw away every “official” prom picture I had, because my boyfriend and I had a very tumultuous relationship. Think Michael and Jan, only without the violence…or the video camera. Anyhoo, I dug through three boxes of pictures and found this little gem.
I also found pictures of what our breakfast nook looked like before we gave it a lobotomy, Daisy in her younger (although just as strange) years, a pic of the day I got my drivers license, and her prom picture.
Now…there’s an interesting story…Sheri and I double-dated on prom night, and it was one of the more uncomfortable meals I’d had. Think Michael and Jan, only without the osso bucco.
Now it’s your turn. Put up the prom pictures. It can’t be any worse than mine…I’m wearing a polka-dotted dress for cripes sake, and my date is wearing a fuschia cummerbund and bowtie.
CU and I got into a rather heated argument last night (well, heated for us) regarding last night’s episode of The Office. Having been really disappointed by the return of My Name is Earl, I half-wondered if I was losing my sense of humor…was especially excited about the mayhem which could only be inspired by a dinner party at Michael and Jan’s condo.
Know what? I didn’t think it was all that funny. Sure, there were some funny quips (Jan referencing Pam’s “doodles”) and amusing scenes (the oft-maligned “house tour” – how often have you forgotten to put the video camera away?). Plus, nothing makes me laugh harder than when television shows try to hide the pregnancies of their stars. At least they didn’t go the floppy hat route with Angela.
BUT.
While I liked the theme I’ve been using the past week or so, I’m not a fan of how it fubars my de.licio.us Daily Links post and how it isn’t really optimal for days when I have multiple posts.
So, we’ll try this one…and I’ll be off fixing the CSS since as you can see…well, you can’t see a lot of things.
I’ll also try to figure out why I”m getting all sorts of “headers already sent” errors since activating this theme. Cripes, if it’s not one thing…it’s another.
Aha…there’s an extra line in the functions.php file. Now let’s see if I can clear the error in the RSS feed by updating this post…
First off, thanks to everyone who commented and emailed me about yesterday’s storm. I appreciate it, and am incredibly grateful that we have power…and that bits and pieces of our house didn’t wind up in our pool (if we had one), in other people’s yards, or down the street.
Things are starting to look better around here. What I have always found rather amusing about destructive storms is the joke nature plays by ordering up beautiful weather the next day. Once the haze burned off yesterday morning, it was warm and sunny. Perfect damage-assessing weather.
No…that’s not our house. It’s our next-door neighbor’s house. Thankfully.
So let’s back up a few hours. I went to bed last night, expecting to be woken up (for the second night in a row) by overnight storms. What I didn’t expect was to be woken up by our local tornado siren at 3:58 AM. Now here’s what gets me – the stupid thing didn’t sound anything like the siren I hear during the “testing” that takes place the first Wednesday of every month at noon. To be honest, it sounded like that humming noise you hear from live power lines…only really loud.
I didn’t hear any wind or thunder, and I didn’t see any lightning…so I opened up the back door to hear where the sound was coming from. It was coming from the back of the house…and about 1/4 mile down the street is where the siren is. I was 45% awake at this point, so I put two and two together…got 3.5…and then went to grab Cookie and my iPhone, and yell for Daisy to follow me into the Panic Room (aka, the guest bathroom). I got the dogs in there and then went for pillows and blankets and just as soon as I shut the door, the wind started.
Total time elapsed: 90 seconds
There’s nothing quite like sitting in your Panic Room with the world swirling around you outside…I’ve now experienced this twice in the 6 1/2 years we’ve lived in this house. The first time was last year. Ironically, CU has been gone both times. I’m beginning to think he knows something I don’t.
I have all sorts of interesting stories from previous jobs, most of which I have filed away in the “Don’t be ‘that’ boss when you grow up” mental folder.
Now that I’m approaching four years removed from my last job, I think it’s probably safe for me to tell that interesting tale. I had worked at the company for about a year and a half, and had just come back from a wonderful week off at Christmas. I was immediately summoned to my boss’s office, where she introduced me to a man I’ll call Pointy Haired Non-Boss and told me she had a great opportunity for me if I was up for the challenge. But, she said it in that, “It doesn’t really matter if you’re up for it, you’re going to do it anyway” tone of voice. I was being promoted to Project Manager and was tasked with rolling out a rather significant new product…in six weeks.
I had been in that position before – in the job I left three years before that. I’m not one to back down from a challenge, but when I’m backed into a corner and fight really isn’t an option anymore, your only other option is flight – and I said as much to my boss. “You know, the last time I was put in this sort of position, I wound up quitting the job.”
I wish I knew why that first link was wigging out…I left a comment for the blog theme designer but so far, no word. Everything looks fine in the other themes. As much as I really like this theme, I’ll need to switch to something else if I don’t hear back soon!
At lunch today I was watching The Hills (yeah, I know…hence the blog title) and realized how dramatically different my life was at 22 than Lauren’s life. For example…
- Lauren drives a brand spankin’ new BMW…I drove a highly oxidized 1985 Nissan 200SX with only three hubcaps.
- Lauren hung out at S Bar on her 22nd birthday. I think my friends and I went to TGI Friday’s.
- Lauren has a “sort of boyfriend, sort of friend” in Brody and they can’t seem to just call off the flirtation and move on. Okay, I kind of had that going on with me, too.
- When Lauren wants to talk to one of her friends from work, she can either text or call on her cell phone. I had to hide in a conference room on my break and use the phone in there.
- I bought most of my clothes at Ross. I don’t think that’s where Lauren shops.
- Lauren lives in the oh-so-sexy “Hillside Villas” (okay, they don’t really live there…), and I lived in the hood – which apparently, has been completely renovated. For the record, back in ’95 when I lived there – I paid $480 a month with all the move-in specials.
- Lauren goes to sexy restaurants for dinner with friends. We usually went and got Taco Bell, then went back to someone’s house to watch The X Files.
- Lauren has to deal with an immature, whiny, pain-in-the-ass freak spreading rumors about her. I dodged that bullet. My guy friends had more class than that…and spent most of their time playing Doom, anyway.
- My sunglasses weren’t as big.
When I was in high school, a group of my friends decided to go see George Michael at Arco Arena in Sacramento. I was invited but had to decline, because Mom said no. I was too young, too far to go, blah, blah, blah. I was crushed. I was a huge George Michael fan and wanted to go sooooo badly. But nooooo…Mom wouldn’t let me go. Didn’t matter that I’d be going with the Student Body President, the answer was no.
Pout.
Now though…it seems as though I am getting my second chance, as CU and I have tickets to see him in July. This is sort of an extremely belated birthday present, since the tickets CU got for us to go see Billy Joel back in December never showed up. After fighting with PayPal for three months we did finally get our money back but nevertheless, I never got to see the concert.
It’s really sort of tragic in retrospect, that my first concert wound up being Bell Biv Devoe instead of George Michael.
Since I don’t have a debate to prepare for, or any mandatory reading…what am I doing? Why, I’m watching The Real World Awards Bash!
The hilarious (and frankly, quite disturbing) thing about this is not only the awesome walk down memory lane, but also the rather marked changes both in the show and in society over the past eighteen years.
Every shot of Real Worlders from the first eight seasons or so show them off in a corner…having a cocktail, taking it all in. Then…every shot of Real Worlders in seasons since then involve a minimum of two women rubbing up against each other.
Alrighty. Now that the pesky Spring semester is out of the way, I can get back to blogging.
So what’s going on with all of you? All six of you who have the sticktuitiveness to still swing by here from time to time to see if I’m ever coming back out of the cave, that is. Any big plans for the weekend? CU and I are going to Roy’s tonight so I can get drunk off Hawaiian martinis and then…get this…I have no other plans for the weekend.
Let me say that again…I have no other plans for the weekend. Ooooh, I could just squeal with glee at the happiness saying that brings me. CU muttered something about doing yard work, since it’s the first truly nice weekend of the season…but I guess that’s his idea of how to relax after reading my research proposal fifteen times.
Although I haven’t been blogging all that much, I have been Twittering and Facebooking (thanks, Adelle) a lot. There’s nothing like a good game of Scramble to clear all that nonsense about null hypotheses and literature reviews out of your head, you know? By the by, if you’re on Facebook…drop me an email at snarkwifedotcomATgmail.com and let me know. If I know who you are, we can “socially network.” Isn’t that what the kids are calling it these days?
I faithfully followed the flock, and successfully upgraded (well, except for my Compact Archives plug-in) my blog to WordPress 2.5.
If you don’t have this handy dandy little plug-in, I highly recommend it. For someone who’s petrified of doing anything to her blog..this really helps me stay up-to-date.
I’m going to be making some updates (it’s Spring…out with the old, in with the new), so if things look a little strange, you’ll know why.
In other news…want to know why ATA went out of business? Sure, they lost their military charter contract but gee…how about a little false advertising to go along with it?
Yeah, I’m actually writing a blog post…can you believe it? So much for Blog 365! Eh, it was probably a lofty goal to begin with but when school (or more specifically, my Applied Research Methods class) began to sprout fangs and take on a life of its own…there was little I could do except roll over and submit.
Until today.
Today I finished my research proposal and I kid you not, when I declared it 100% complete I looked out the window of my office and the clouds began to part. I actually snickered out loud at this realization.
Anyhoo, it has been an ugly semester but I am just a couple of days away from completion. Sure, I still have my Strategic Marketing final to take but it’s only worth 15% of my final grade, and I have until Friday to take it.
But, I am still here. I briefly thought about putting up a photo of my 36-year old paunchy tummy and letting everyone in on the big secret as to why I’ve been gone for so long since I guess, flowing clothes = baby bump and not bloating, as I’ve been leading myself to believe all these years. Go figure.
Seriously though, I have a ton of things to talk about…Dancing with the Stars, American Idol, The Bachelor: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious…and what about all those NBC shows we have starting back up this Thursday?
Best of all…did ya’ll hear about the Robin Sparkles b-side ballad? Word.
Sorry to blog and run, but I need to go get my head re-wrapped around the ideas of strategic planning versus strategic thinking. Back soon!
By the by…any advice on the big WordPress 2.5 upgrade? Hey, just because I’ve been living under a rock doesn’t mean my Google Reader feeds don’t work.
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dailymile
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