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Well, CU and I went to see George Michael last night, which was a replacement concert for the Obnoxious Billy Joel Birthday Fiasco of ‘07.

The tickets said the show would begin promptly at 8 PM. Wow, cool. That would be a first! And, it would have been a first had it actually happened. GM didn’t manage to make it on stage until close to 9 PM, and I suspect that only happened because once the crowd started doing the wave (10,000 strong), it’s only a short hop to rushing the stage and riots at the concession stands…and who wants to be responsible for that?

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram seemed to have better overall things to say about the show than the Dallas Morning News did, which I found interesting since GM became Dallas’s Darling after he moved here (part-time, anyway) to live with partner Kenny Goss awhile back. Last week I also perused the internets checking out reviews of other concerts and the reviews were not very good. The light show was tacky, there wasn’t anyone at the concert…past his prime, blah blah blah. I was a little worried we’d get there and would be two of about a hundred people in attendance. I was so blessedly wrong.

I’ve never done a concert review…not sure where to start.

The Crowd: A mix of just about everything. You had your gaggles of women in their mid-30s who squealed and shrieked every time GM said “I Want Your…Sex” twenty years ago, guy/girl couples, girl/girl couples, guy/guy couples, and even a few Carrie Bradshaw/Stanford Blatch pairings. Or so I thought, until the guy sitting next to me referred to his gal pal as his wife. Oops. Guess my gaydar ain’t as sharp as I thought it was…or my straightdar needs a tune-up. Bottom line…everyone was dancing and singing and yelling and clapping. I think it was the only concert I’d ever gone to where it didn’t seem like anyone was trying to act cooler than they actually were…by just standing there stoically while everyone else looked like maniacs.

The Music: Spanned the George Michael songbook…from Everything She Wants to Father Figure to Too Funky to Stuff Off His New Album. We were even treated to his beautiful renditions of Roxanne (seriously, you don’t have to put on the red dress) and The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face. The Roberta Flack classic is one of those songs only a few people can sing…one you don’t want to try out on American Idol, you know?

The only song he didn’t perform last night I would have liked to have heard…was Praying For Time. That seemed like an apt song given the current Global Unrest and all that, but instead, we were treated to the first song he ever wrote…when he was eight. The man’s a master, I tell you.

I agree with the real critics who said it was wise for him to pass on Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go, and I was glad not to hear I Want Your Sex. That was a great song when we were juniors in high school and felt all dangerous and grown-up by dancing to it…but now it would have just probably given me the icks, watching all of us 20 years later dancing to it.

The Stage Show: It was a little on the Eurotrash cheesy side, and a couple of times I expected things to transform into a downtown Vegas casino facade with P Diddy and Mase flanking GM on either side (track suit!), but for the most part it worked. I did like how his band was on three levels…that was cool.

Giggleworthy Moments:

1. When I went to the restroom during the intermission, there were two women in one of the stalls. Their high-heeled feet were facing each other. Don’t even want to know.
2. Women bitching about the cost of the $9 margaritas.  I’m sorry, have you never been to American Airlines Center?
3. The rather large, African-American male usher on the floor a couple of rows in front of us…singing along to Careless Whisper.
4. The number of morons who actually left when he said “Goodnight!” the first time.  If the lights haven’t come up…don’t leave!  You’ll miss both encores!

Short story long, it was a great show…probably in the top three concerts I’ve seen. We made it back home at about 12:30 AM and when all was said and done, probably didn’t get to sleep until close to 1:30 AM. And man, am I paying for that today. I am beat. Maybe I’ll take a nap at lunch.