snarkwifedotcom

Archive for the ‘Dancing With The Stars’ Category

So, it’s Earth Day…and I plan on celebrating by filling up my Jeep Grand Cherokee’s 20-gallon gas tank for $65. Ah…it sounds gas-guzzly, but when you factor in the fact that I only fill ‘er up once every three weeks, all of a sudden I’m an conservation goddess!

So. How about those folks over on Dancing With the Stars? My mom called me a couple of weeks ago and said, “So what do you think of the season?” My answer then…as it remains now, is “Eh.” I had that same silly smile on my face during the season premiere that I’ve had every season but once Steve Guttenberg went away and Adam Carrolla unicycled off the show, I’ve felt…surprisingly little.

This isn’t to say I’m hating the show now, or that no one is entertaining me. Jason Taylor has definitely grown on me, and it is great fun watching him and Edyta dance together. Physically, they’re so compatible. Same for Derek and Shannon. But. Shannon isn’t that great of a dancer. She tries really hard, and you can’t help but notice the growing affection between the two (Can you imagine some of those other couples “platonically” tumbling onto each other on the beach at sunset? Mmm hmm.)…but she’s just not all that good.

(more…)

Oh good God almighty…what were those atrocities on Dancing With the Stars last night? And by atrocities, I mean “freestyle routines.” Now granted, I was laid up in bed with the worst flu symptoms I’ve ever experienced, but when Marie and Jonathan came on stage with “Start Me Up” with Marie in her weirdo Whatever Happened to Baby Jane getup, I thought the fever was causing me to cross over to the other side.

Mel and Maks were terrible, too…their avant-garde, experimental dancing routine was certainly…er…original, but I was left feeling…flush, and feverish. Oh, and achy, too. Damn flu.

Helio and Julianne were great and out of the three freestyle routines, theirs was clearly the best - but what does that really mean? Your two classmates failed the exam, but you got a C - you were the best out of the class!

Kind of a lame end to the season. If Marie wins though, well…I don’t know what I’m going to do. Maybe hope Donny will show up next season and get kicked off in the first round.

Okay, I Hear You. Lesson Learned.

I’m not a terribly religious person, but I should have known God would punish me for ripping on Donny “My Love Is Like a Sacred Emotion” Osmond…his and Marie’s dad passed away this morning.

Okay, I officially feel awful. And can I just say, Dancing With the Stars is not the show to be on if you have an aging parent?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketSo last night, I’m watching Dancing With the Stars and thinking to myself…Donny Osmond has turned into such an ass! Dude, we get the DWTS folks didn’t ask you to be on the show…we get that you’re milking your guest-host spots on Entertainment Tonight for all they’re worth (”Coming up next…I give you classified behind-the-scenes news! My sister has a lot of kids!”) and we get you’re a camera hog who can’t let his sister actually enjoy the spotlight.

Kind of makes you think he’s trying to fill seats for the “Osmonds! Live! No! Really! ‘08! Tour!” Going forward, just stay seated and try not to alienate any of the stars of Carpoolers who may be seated near you.

Clearly, there’s a writer’s strike going on, as now even Samantha Harris is writing her own jokes! “I know this is the point in the show where no one is listening to what I say…” Indeed! Now, I’m not a member of any Writer’s Guilds, but here’s what I would have had Bruno say had I been writing his lines last night:

  • On Mel & Maksim’s paso doble: “Free your mind, and I will definitely follow!”
  • On Jane & Tony’s quick step: “Walk the line? You CROSSED the line and showed us how to CASH in on your talents!
  • On Jennie & Derek’s rhumba: “Jennie, if Valerie Malone could see you now!”

I thought the whole “Pawlidarity for Sabrina” campaign was a little odd - while sweet, if she hadn’t gone home, one of them would have. It’s easy to sport a paw on your pec when you’re still standing on the stage. Like I said, I will support the pawlidarity until the results from tonight’s show, then will switch themes…because by then Sabrina will be twice-removed and no one will care anymore.

As an aside…Sabrina and Mark are dating…this has been confirmed! OMG! I LOVE HIM! He’s my SOULMATE!

Just a little commentary on The Bachelor last night, as well…do you all remember…back in the day, when there was a chance the bachelorettes might decline the Fantasy Suite invitation, or at least hesitate a bit because, well, you don’t know where the bachelor’s junk has been in the last couple of days? No more…oh no, this is a new generation of women who won’t even read the card they want to bed the man so quickly. Eh, like any of these relationships are going to last.

NaBloPoMo - Day Four-ish

Okay, so I was writing my NaBloPoMo post last night about Dancing With the Stars…and it was actually pretty good. Then, I hit the “Publish” button and…poof! Internet connection error! GRRRRRR!

You know what, Leopard? You’re pissing me off more and more each day with your widely reported wireless connectivity issues.

So, do I get credit if I wrote a blog post last night, but it doesn’t publish until this morning?

Oh, I switched back to the paw-centric theme in support of ousted Cheetah Girl Sabrina Bryan. It’s what all the cool kids are doing this week, and you know I’m all about being a cool kid.

So, I realized over the weekend that I am a much happier person when I’m blogging every day. I don’t know if it’s the active engagement with the Outside World (”I posted! Ping Blogrolling! Come on over and talk to me!”) aspect which pulls the happiness lever, or the opportunity to think about something other than work, school and home improvement projects.

But, it’s true…so…let’s talk, shall we?

I’m playing in a Fafarazzi TV league for Dancing With the Stars, and have had the same “team” of three couples since the show began…Mel B, Helio, and Sabrina. I briefly thought about replacing Mel B with Marie yesterday afternoon, but really, how was I supposed to know Jennie Garth could overcome Her Professional Partner, Gumby, and pull off a fantastic tango? Kelly Taylor…coke addict, cult member, rape victim, shooting victim, sexually harassed employee, boutique owner, Alpha Omega girl…ballroom dancer? Will wonders ever cease?

Anyone else besides me want Donny Osmond on DWTS next season? Anyone else besides me want to take all of Cheryl Burke’s trophies away from her, because she’s being such a snit? You can’t be a champion every season, girlfriend.

Oh…and let’s talk about Wayne “Don’t Call Me Steven Seagal” Newton. Eww. Seriously…eww. I think Mama Snark said it best last night, “He should have stopped after the first face lift.”

And…thanks Mark Cuban, for finally learning to not sing along with the music while you dance.

Thank God It’s Thursday

Josie went home…as predicted. Private Practice was unbearable…as expected.

We did watch Dirty Sexy Money last night and, you know what? I liked it. CU liked it. We enjoy the Darling family (Is Chuck the black sheep?) and their Kennedy/Hilton family tendencies, and I just love Peter Krause. I’ve been a fan since Sports Night. Nick George and the darlings are just that perfect juxtaposition of good versus…well, not evil necessarily, but seriously effed up.

Intrigue abounds…why does Karen have so many failed marriages? Sure, she’s been in love with Nick since she was a little girl, but she’s obviously looking for love…and sadly, with men who only seem to be interested in her financial and professional connections. By the way, Daniel Cosgrove (Matt from Beverly Hills, 90210) as Freddy…the PGA player…hilarious.

Also hilarious? Nick’s assistant Daisy and her selection of ringtones for each member of the Darling brood…”Rich Girl” for Juliet, “Pretty Woman” for Karen and “Hallelujah” for Reverend “I hate you” Jeremy. And, congratulations to Blackberry, for further showing the world that the Crackberry can, indeed, ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

What else does the show have…tranny hookers (“She’s not a tranny hooker.” - Patrick), suspicious plane crashes, a decades-long affair, an illegitimate child…and wonderful, wonderful Jeremy Darling. Naming his Asian sister-in-law, “No Fun” was the high point of the evening. Wait, wait…I take that back. The high point of the evening was a really weird cameo by Dan Rather. Huh?

So in my Fafarazzi Dancing With the Stars Fantasy League, at the last minute I switched out Helio for Floyd. Big mistake. Big. Why can’t I simply trust my gut? I now know better, and also understand the rules of Fafa TV leagues a bit better.

Thoughts on last night’s beefcake-fest…

  • Helio is perfect…even if I’m now sort-of forced to call him Jean Girard.
  • Len wisely refrained from telling Wayne Newton he reminded Len of himself as a young man.
  • CU and I are at odds with each other over who has the hotter girl crush - me with Edyta, and him with Julianne.
  • Speaking of Edyta, YAY for finally geting a partner who is physically compatible with her.
  • What is it with this show and all the invalids? Robo-Leg from last season, Old Man Cuban’s hip replacement, and then Cameron had some sort of disease as a child which left his legs in braces for several months? Where’s that girl with the webbed toes from The Bachelor on Monday? She’d fit right in.

The guys were just fantastic last night…even Floyd, once Karina executed her pout-and-leave-the-room act with standard precision, which always seems to melt her “jackassy” partners to a pool of ballroom goo. I don’t get that. Floyd has a lot of…spirit…he just needs to figure out how to dance. Funny thing, I think I said something similar about Emmitt Smith awhile back.

Going home tonight: Josie Moran. How do I know this? Well, when Tom Bergeron was talking about someone going home on the results show, the camera focused squarely on Ms. Moran’s face. Then, when earlier in the show Tom talked about the stress of the ladies and “someone may go home,” the camera cut to the ladies lined up in their chairs, with Jennie Garth reaching over Josie to grab Sabrina’s hand. It was so awkward, we had to back it up and watch again. You can see the exact moment when Josie mistakenly thinks all three ladies are going to join hands in solidarity but no, she quickly realizes her gaffe and puts her hands back in her lap. Ouch.

**Confidential to Samantha Harris: I need you to come back to the show. As much as I used to snark on you and your spokesmodel tendencies, I’m getting sick of hearing Drew Lachey compare all of his scores to this season’s scores thus far. His exchange with Cheryl Burke last night which ended with, “I think Wayne might be the best partner I’ve ever had,” made me want to throw a shoe at the TV. Please come back. You can even bring the baby. No one will mind.**

Well folks, I don’t really know what a Cheetah Girl is, but Miss Sabrina Bryan and her too-hot newcomer partner Mark Ballas were super-fierce last night! Damn you, America’s Next Top Model, why did you have to go and put the word “fierce” into my vocabulary?

As expected, Len, Carrie Ann and Bruno didn’t care for the hip-hop improv towards the end of their dance, but who cares? They had chemistry which reminds me of Julianne Hough & Apollo Anton Ohno - fun and young and powerful right out of the gate. Unless she does something stupid, is it possible for me to pick my favorite on the first night?

I’m-British-But-I-Have-Both-My-Legs Spice also started off strong last night, with perennial great parnter Maksim Chmerovokoskoskischlinowitski. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone that giggly, and all over the place. For some weird reason, I kept expecting her to pop out her best Nenah Cherry with, “Whot is she liiiiiike? Whot’s she like, anyway?”

(more…)

Save a Horse, Ride a Mavs Owner

It just keeps getting better over there at Fafarazzi!

Mark Cuban, Wayne Newton Try `Dancing’ - Forbes.com

TMZ announced the alleged Dancing With the Stars roster yesterday…ahead of the ABC announcement…and was WRONG! I mean really, what were the odds we’d get two 90210 alums, especially with Tori working on her own show?

Who else did they unnecessarily tease us with…Lou Ferrigno…Nia Peeples…Gisele Bundchen (really?)…and Aaron Carter. And after seeing that horrible show about the Carter brothers, I am very happy he’s not on the official list. I could so see him getting all grabby with Julianne Hough. That would anger CU, let me tell you.

I am happy though, about the Mark Cuban choice…if for no other reason than it means all of our local newscasts will make fun of him until he’s voted off, which should be about a week.

My favorite in the bunch though, is definitely Wayne Newton. Every season we’ve had the Awesomely Aging Guy…George Hamilton, Jerry Springer, John Ratzenberger…but…which Professional Partner will they team up with him? Edyta?

Tune in for the season premiere on Monday, September 24!

Who’s Randy Johnson?

Really, Melinda? Ten katrillion weeks into the competition and you can’t remember Randy Jackson’s name?

Even with that completely inexcusable gaffe, your American Idol final two will be…Melinda and Blake. I know, all you Blake-haters (Justin Timberfake, I believe?) think I’m nuts, but I just don’t see Jordin & Melinda in the final two.

If you want to look at the song choices for last evening as clues to who will stay and who will go…Melinda “believes in miracles,” Jordin’s back to standing outside restaurant windows looking sad and pathetic…and Blake doesn’t care if it’s wrong or if it’s right. Simon was in a good mood, Paula was disturbingly bleary-eyed the whole show (they didn’t even bother to put eye makeup on her)…and Randy would like Blake to become part of Maroon 6.

And for those of you still watching Dancing With the Stars…Ian and Cheryl went home last night. I almost expected Cheryl to knock Ian to the ground and kick the crap out of him for dashing her hopes of a DWTS hat trick. In defense of Ian though, Cheryl’s choreography was really tame and dull next to the more exciting offerings of Julianne Hough…and she doesn’t have that cute Australian accent like Kym Johnson.

On tap for tonight…the ultimate immunity challenge on Lost, and…Melinda goes home. Hey, I was right last week with LaKisha. Then again, I also picked Chris Sligh to go all the way.

PS - I got a perfect score on my first unit essay for Org Behavior…I rock! Game on, Marge!

Last night’s Laugh-Out-Loud Quote O’ The Night during Dancing With The Stars goes once again to Capt. UberHusband who quipped, while Ian Ziering and Cheryl Burke were dancing to “Baby It’s Cold Outside,” “Maybe you should cover up your back, Cheryl.”

He is so funny.

We’ll omit speaking about Billy Ray Cyrus, because it’s insulting he’s still around…but, why was Joey Fatone dancing with JonBenet Ramsey? That was, by far, the WORST costuming I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Sure, the dress floated and twirled appropriately but, you have to admit, it did look like a cotton candy confectionary pageant dress.

(more…)

Singing In The Key Of Nasal

Okay…I didn’t pay much attention last night during American Idol. CU and I were busy updating my resume for my UoD application…and listening to Cookie cough. Seems the poodle has been stricken by the demon illness of little dogs…a collapsing trachea. Sigh…yeah, that’s it’s own barrel of laughs. For a dog whose life mission it has been to kick ass now and ask questions later, it’s very frustrating to see her being knocked around by this. I’m taking her back in to the vet today, as she seems to have gotten worse since we put her on the meds…so it’s time for x-rays to see what we’re officially dealing with.

5:11 PM Update: It’s not a collapsed trachea, it’s fluid in her lungs…which if we can’t clear it out, will likely indicate she’s at the beginning stages of heart disease. Damn poodle. She’s now on FOUR meds, so…say a doggie prayer everything clears out and the coughing subsides. I’m not ready to pass over into that stage of her life, yet.

Back to American Idol…I did see Sanjaya’s kinda freaky (although, THANK YOU SANJAYA for not doing your hair Bonnie Raitt-style) version of “Something To Talk About”, and LaKisha’s very weird rendition of “Jesus Take The Wheel” and…Chris singing, again, in the key of Chris.

(more…)

Squeeeeeeeeeee!

Buh-bye Leeza, welcome back Drew!

I don’t know which part of his impromptu encore performance was more entertaining…seeing the Severe Thunderstorm Watch up in the corner of my TV screen the whole performance, or hearing Big & Rich sing the lyrics, “I sang ever Drew Lachey song I could think of, then we made love” - really? Name one Drew Lachey song…and “I Do (Cherish You)” doesn’t count, because we all know Screech from Saved By The Bell sang that one.

Weird and Hot and Strange and Sexy

So, let’s talk about television last night…specifically, let’s talk about how critical the Paso Doble is on Dancing With The Stars. The bar was raised so high by Drew Lachey and Cheryl Burke in season two, that I now just assume no one else can bullfight like they did. Sadly, I was right.

Plus, the judges were in an odd mood last night. Although Carrie Anne correctly identified Billy Ray Cyrus’s Paso Doble as an odd combination of weird and hot and strange and sexy, Len and Bruno were bickering like a married couple…nitpicking everything, and making me grateful when Samantha Harris took over the microphone. Yeah, you won’t see me write that again.

I’ve said it before…song selection is critical…and unfortunately, the dancers have no choice in what song they get. I envision all of the couples standing around on Wednesday afternoon, drawing straws to see who gets stuck with This Week’s Sucky Song. Remember the week Lisa Rinna was saddled with “The Final Countdown”? Laila and Maksim drew the short straw this week. Who dances the Paso Doble to a march?

(more…)

I understand when people get on in years, society is a lot more tolerant of their fashion choices but, really now…Tony…a yellow blazer?

Last night’s American Idol theme was “Standards Anyone Can Sing In Any Key They Choose”. The standouts included the usual…Mindy Doo and LaKisha…but, who would have thought Chris Richardson would bring some updated sexy back to a song any woman around my age remembers as “The Love Theme From When Harry Met Sally?”

And Sanjaya…oh, Sanjaya. I was telling CU that he was actually pretty good in the auditions, but…has just gotten worse and worse. I’m not necessarily talking about the singing because…really…he was never going to win. However, is there a reason he feels the need to just phone it in now? When it looked like he was at least trying, I was able to get on board the “it’s so bad it’s good” train. Now though…with even Ryan Seacrest upping the mock factor…I don’t blame Simon for just sitting there and saying, “Whatever. You’re brilliant.”

Even the chick who went on a hunger strike until Sanjaya was voted off has given up…ironically…right before Easter! In retrospect..how awesome would it have been for all of us to have given up Sanjaya for Lent? Had we known then what we know now…

Tonight…please America…tell me you’re sending Haley “Bright Lights, Short Skirts” Scarnato home. We all know Sanjaya isn’t going anywhere.

As a side note…CU and I missed most of Dancing With The Stars, as WFAA decided to pre-empt most of the results show with some hooey about a tornado in Arlington and omnipresent doppler radar images. Wisely though, they cut back just in time for me to find out Lady and the Tramp Tattoo were sticking around…and Shandi & Slight were headed home.

Tonight…Friday Night Lights, Haley goes home…and Kate and Juliet roll around in the mud!

Heather Mills: 2; RoboLeg: 1

I think I’ve figured out what my issue is with Shandi & Brian on Dancing With The Stars. Remember back in…oh, I don’t know…fifth or sixth grade, when they’d corral all of the kids in the cafeteria on rainy days and force us to learn important life skills like the Virginia Reel?

At that point, we ladies were starting to experience our growth spurt, while the boys were still stuck being shorter than us…and slighter than us. That’s CU’s word…slight…and how he described Brian in proportion to Ms. Shandissey.

No doubt, I’m sure Shandi & Brian are nice people…but they’re just…weird. They have zero chemistry, and…could their dancing be described as pitchy? Please, oh please…send them home tonight.

The Good: Joey & Kim, dancing the Tango to the Star Wars theme (with guest star R2-D2!); Ian & Cheryl, getting in touch with his inner Chippendale and rocking the shakin’ ass…and Skater Boi & Julianne, who are so very awesome together.

The Bad: While I do continue to give props to Heather Mills and the courage it takes to come out and do that thing she does each week now, talk about an unfair advantage. No one else gets to go get a bouncier leg so they can dance better. Hell, Master P clunked around on his own two stiff legs and managed to make it through 3 or 4 weeks of competition. While she was good, and girlfriend gets credit for coming out in the shoes she was wearing, she really wasn’t 24-points good. Unfortunately, I’m going to have to award this round of the competition to RoboLeg.

And, in rather efficient fashion, Leeza Gibbons’s “tramp” tattoo (giggle! it’s fake!) has replaced Phil Stacey’s knitted cap as the Next Big Thing. Such a cutthroat world…the land of sidekick accessories.

Hey…did you hear Survivor would be on tonight? No, not that Survivor…this Survivor! Rrrow!

Weren’t those some of the Seven Dwarfs? Breaky, Creaky & Achy?

Props to the always-funny Capt. UberHusband, for summing up Dionne Warwick’s performances on Dancing With The Stars last night:

“It’s sort of funny when everyone watching this show probably doesn’t remember her for her songs, but for the fact that she was a member of the Psychic Friends Network.”

But hey…say what you will about her…she sounds just as good now as she always has, which is a step up from other divas of her generation. Her first song, “Say A Little Prayer” was great…and although I can’t get My Best Friend’s Wedding out of my head as a natural association…watching Our Professional Dancers interpret the song in suspenders comes pretty darn close.

Ms. Warwicks’s second song, the ode-to-Mapquesty, “Do You Know The Way To San Jose?” (“Depends on where you’re starting.” - Capt. UberHusband) was just…weird. The song itself was fine, but they had these two backup dancers (”unrelated twins,” per Tom Bergeron) who did…strange things. It was like soft-core porn the way they were touching each other and moving around each other. Actually, it was more like one of those Aerobicise videos from the early ’80s.

Since Sanjaya’s not competing this season (just you wait…he’ll be there for Season Nine), I was rooting for either Shandi “I Don’t Do Drugs Like Tara” Finnessey to go home or…Leeza “I’m 50!” Gibbons. Shandi’s partner gives me the willies, and I truly fear watching Leeza do the Paso Doble.

However, Paula Porizkova was not on my short list, because she’s funny, and I love her spirit. How can you not adore a woman who says she has no “inner Latina”? But, she went home…and joins, based on the montage I saw last night, a really bitter group of first-round losers from previous seasons. Well, except for Tucker Carlson…he has a thick enough skin to understand what this all means in the grand scheme of things. Ahem…kennymayne.

As I was scanning the CMM point-getters so far, I thought…what would it be like if there were a parallel March Madness tournament for the third-tier one-fafa-wonders we’ve come to know and love? The brackets could include all of the American Idol finalists, contestants on Dancing With the Stars who have both their original legs and…shoot…how about Bill Clinton?

Kinda like the NIT…not quite good enough to get into the Big Show, but entertaining nonetheless. Plus, they’ve got that head-scratching, “Wait…who are they again?” quality.

Plus, you can’t tell me Brangelina didn’t adopt Pax for the Fafa points. I’m sure it’s no coincidence that the adoption was finalized on the exact day CMM started. Unfortunately, at first glance I thought they’d adopted that cable network that used to show nothing but Mama’s Family reruns. I guess that’s next on the horizon, once they’re done adopting children.

(Cross-posted from Fafarazzi.com)

I wanted to talk about this earlier…but since my paraphrasing of articles (see the West Seattle Journal, below) leaves much to be desired today, I’ll let someone else talk about the big announcement for Dancing With The Stars today and just copy and paste so if anything is spelled wrong or if I have a comma outside the quotes or something, I can’t be held responsible. Heh.

Now, while at first some of these selections might make you laugh out loud…we probably all did the same thing when we heard Drew Lachey, Joey Lawrence and Mario Lopez had been tapped for the show.

And, because I can’t help but write it…”Adopt a Minefield” is the same thing as “Marrying a Beatle.”

LAILA ALI - Ali, an undefeated world champion female boxer and youngest daughter of sports legend Muhammad Ali, takes her footwork to the ballroom dance floor on “Dancing with the Stars.” Outside the ring, Ali has graced countless international magazine covers such as Glamour and Italian Vogue, and authored the inspiring autobiography Reach! She joins MAKSIM CHMERKOVSKIY, who returns for his third season.

BILLY RAY CYRUS - Singer/songwriter/actor and star of Disney Channel’s hit series “Hannah Montana,” Cyrus will partner with Season Three’s finalist, KARINA SMIRNOFF, who returns for her second season. Cyrus first entered the public spotlight with his hit song “Achy Breaky Heart.” His other acting credits include the feature film “Mulholland Drive” and the starring role in the series “Doc.”

CLYDE DREXLER - Named One of the 50 Greatest Players in NBA History, “Clyde the Glide” was a member of the 1992 U.S. Olympic Dream Team. He began his career in 1983 with the Portland Trailblazers and retired in 1998 with the Houston Rockets, a team he led to the 1995 NBA Championship. ELENA GRINENKO, who returns for her second season, will be his partner.

JOEY FATONE - The musician/actor/star of Broadway was a member of one of the most popular singing groups of all time, *NSYNC, which holds the records for the most albums sold in a single day and week. He has since starred in the movies “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” and “The Cooler, and in the Broadway musicals “Rent” and “Little Shop of Horrors.” Fatone joins partner KYM JOHNSON, who returns for her second season.

SHANDI FINNESSEY - During the most watched Miss USA(r) competition in six years, Shandi Finnessey was crowned Miss USA in 2004. She is the host of two game shows on the Game Show Network - “Lingo” with Chuck Woolery and “Playmania.” Newcomer BRIAN FORTUNA will be her professional dance partner.

LEEZA GIBBONS - Former host of “Entertainment Tonight, “Extra” and her self-titled daytime talk-show, “Leeza,” the TV/radio personality currently hosts the nationally syndicated radio program, “Hollywood Confidential.” Leeza is also the founder of the Leeza Gibbons Memory Foundation, a nonprofit organization offering empowerment and education to caregivers and their loved ones diagnosed with any memory disorder. She teams up with TONY DOVOLANI, who returns for his third season.

HEATHER MILLS - United Nations Goodwill Ambassador, activist for Adopt-a-Minefield and advocate for animal rights Heather Mills will be the first contestant to compete with an artificial limb. She will be partnered with JONATHAN ROBERTS, who returns for his third season.

APOLO ANTON OHNO - Two-time Olympic gold medal winner Apolo Anton Ohno sets his sights on another trophy to add to his collection, the “Dancing with the Stars” Mirror Ball. As a short-track speed skater, Ohno has a total of five Olympic medals, tying him with Eric Heiden for the most medals of any U.S. Male Winter Olympian. JULIANNE HOUGH teams with Ohno in her first appearance.

VINCENT PASTORE - Known for his standout role in “The Sopranos,” actor Vincen Pastore has also appeared in several movies, including “Revolver,” directed by Guy Ritchie, “Gotti” and “Goodfellas.” He was also the voice of Luca in the animated feature “Shark Tale.” Pastore teams with EDYTA SLIWINSKA, the only professional dancer to participate in all four seasons.

PAULINA PORIZKOVA - As the former face of Estee Lauder, Porizkova was once the highest paid supermodel in the world of fashion. She was featured on the cover of several magazines, including the “Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Issue” for two consecutive years. This Spring Porizkova releases her first work of fiction, A Model Summer. Season One champ ALEC MAZO returns for his second appearance.

IAN ZIERING - One of the stars of the hit TV series “Beverly Hills 90210,” actor Ian Ziering also played a supporting role in the movie “Domino,” and wrote, produced, directed and starred in the short film “Man vs. Monday.” He teams with two-time defending champion CHERYL BURKE, who returns for her third season.

Gee, A Tie. Imagine That.

I have to talk about Dancing With The Stars for a second because gosh, I don’t know who I want to win. It was easy last season. This season, I love Emmitt, but I think Mario is the better dancer. And, I had to agree with Adelle when she IM’d me that Emmitt’s green shoes were definitely a fashion don’t.

My grandma and aunt are rooting for Emmitt…I think I’m going to have to go with Mario. Maybe if he wins, he’ll get a whole week named after him in Chula Vista and I can finally get the Fafarazzi points I’ve been waiting for, when he and Karina go public.

And lucky me, I am officially “laid up.” My toe is most definitely sprained and fortunately, I don’t have to drive anywhere today. I have my trusty nursemaid Cookie literally at my side, and Daisy is laying under the coffee table, licking her paw. She must be on a break.

Your Drive Time Update

I received an email this morning that my old domain has been released back into the wild…and now I’m at a bit of a crossroads. Do I snatch it again, do I go for a new domain…or do I just stay put and enjoy the fruits of Wordpress.com and it’s freeness?

There are a lot of things about Wordpress.com that I really enjoy - of course, it’s free - and it’s easy and I don’t have to worry about security or uploading anything or managing folders, etc. - but with that comes a lack of flexibility. I can’t post anything to my blog that has any embedded code or Flash, and while that’s not necessarily a deal-killer, there are a few things I’d like to post - a Flickr badge of more than my most recent three photos, the “Now Playing” list from iLike…and my team ranking from Fafarazzi.

Plus, I have severe ADD when it comes to blog presentation - and I’d be able to download more themes for a hosted WP blog than are currently available at WP.com.

Please…someone tell me what to do.

On a totally unrelated note, we had to bid adieu to Jerry Springer last night and I’m predicting Mario Lopez will take the great state of California and win Dancing With The Stars. I’m loving Emmitt Smith more every week (despite my loathing of all things Cowboys), but I think Mario has been the most consistent. And, I’ll admit it now…in front of you all…I have a girl crush on Edyta. No woman can be that hot - which is why I think I’m not intimidated by her - she must be some sort of robot. Heh. That sorta rhymed.

I also read…somewhere…that Lost was going to kill off another primary character, and we would be “shocked and surprised” at who it is. I’m hoping it’s BenHen but if it is…then Dr. Jack is going to be 0-for-way too many when it comes to saving lives on that island. Boone died, Shannon died, Ana Lucia died, Colleen died, the pilot died…just don’t let Sawyer die. I’m now loving his character way too much for him to die…which is precisely why he’ll probably go.

And…why is there a fertility doctor on the island? Are they trying to create some sort of master race or something?

Current Conditions

Archives

Stats

Dictionary of Corporate BS - Word o' the Day

card, my: Paper status symbol that is the subject of bizarre corporate pornography with fixations centering on variations in card stock, font, printing, etc.; often distributed indiscriminately at restaurants and funerals; forum for some of the most inspired work ever executed by employees, who get "creative" with their job titles while still managing not to lie, e.g., the photocopy repair guy becomes Junior Technical Operative, or a meaningless title is made up altogether, like Enterprise Solutions Manager; most valuable use is entering raffles for free lunch.


Flickrfeed

Afternoon Nap

Random Cookie Pic

Clouds

Daisy, tuckered out after her walk

Shiny happy grill

Outdoor seating