You know it’s a great world we live in when you get to watch two damaged Merediths on one night…nay…within the same hour. It’s an even greater world when you get to watch people do insane things over a shiny object.

Over on The Office we were treated to Meredith getting whacked in the face by Pam’s “Don’t call me Eli” football pass, and then over on Grey’s Anatomy we’re witnesses to Mere being metaphorically whacked in the face by the sight of an unbelievably chipper Derek and Rose. Sakes alive, those two should be in toothpaste commercials.

Then we have something shiny under Stanley’s car on The Office which results in Michael getting a full peanut butter head massage by Dwight (watch out…Bliss will have it on its services menu in a week), and a shiny Sparkle Pager which prompts our Grey’s residents to continue to act like immature, moronic interns. Really? Sparkle Pager?

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Well. I’d like to say it was a big surprise that it was Carly Smithson who went home last night on American Idol, but isn’t that sort of how it goes with this show now?

It happens every season. Ryan stands there with the Bottom Two and you’re thinking, “Well Syesha, you’ll do well on Broadway” and then…wha? Huh? Did Seacrest just say Carly Smithson’s going home?

All I can say is, kudos to the AI producers for finally getting its head out of its collective ass and having the bottom two perform before someone was sent home. I’ve always thought it was exceptionally cruel to have the singer going home sing the song that made them lose. Again.

Hey! Grey’s Anatomy returns tonight! Does anyone care?

Let’s get this out of the way…all you knitting aficionados out there…do you really put the poofy ball thing on knitted caps on the top of the knitted cap before you’re done knitting it? That bugged me all through the final few minutes of last night’s Grey’s Anatomy. I dunno, that just seems like a “finishing” sort of thing.

Does anyone care there aren’t any more original episodes of this show in the pipeline? Did anyone else besides me want to put Izzie Stevens through a meat grinder and feed her to the wild animals roaming around McDreamy’s McAwesome McProperty? Finally…but most importantly…was The Faith Healer storyline schlocky and jump-the-sharky? I mean really…Bailey’s son is healed…just like that? Too bad The Faith Healer can’t go to Meredith’s house…although at this point it would probably take six years to fix her.

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Survivor

• I’m a little disturbed that James’s vocabulary seems to only consists of the words “dumb-ass,” “unintelligible mumble,” and “bitch” (as in, skinny or dumb-ass). I refuse to just brush this off and dismiss it because, as CU says, “Well, he is a gravedigger.”
• Poor Denise. I know what it’s like not to get picked for a team. On the upside though, no one could blame you for losing the Reward Challenge.
• Au revoir, Jean-Robert. How come you’re the only person who didn’t lose any weight while you were there? Hey, that rhymed.

Grey’s Anatomy

• Okay, does it make me a mean person if I’m all giggly and excited that George and Izzie are having lousy, tooth-chipping sex? I’ve now realized I don’t mind if they’re doing it, I just don’t want it to be any good…because, ew.
• Chief Webber is a pain in the ass. Who did his laundry the whole time he was holed up in that hotel? You can’t tell me he sent his clothes out to be cleaned…when it’s, like, $5 to clean a pair of underbritches.
• For all you women out there…if you want to have sex with your husband/boyfriend/whatever…the code shall now be, “Want to get together later and watch The Godfather?”
• So, did Callie get fired as in, “no longer at Seattle Grace” or fired as in “no longer Chief Resident?” When I hear the word “fired,” I imagine a box to clear out your locker and a security escort to your car.
• I cheered when Lexie said, “Screw you” to Meredith. Meredith has become, by far, the most annoying character on television. Sort of want to toss her back into the Puget Sound and let her get a bit of that coveted clarity again.
• Sad at the end though, with Papa Grey. No wonder Lexie…er…Meredith…er…Lexie…is sleeping with inappropriate men.
• Um…where’s Joe? His bar is there…but where’s Joe?

ER

It says a lot when I turn to CU during this show and say, “You know, I really think ER is better than Grey’s Anatomy.” If your head is jerking around in disagreement, hear me out. It’s consistently funnier (Neela’s 19-year old intern, anyone? Guy could beat the crap out of George any day of the week.) …the dramatic storylines are truly dramatic (Gates dealing with the death of a beloved patient, Abby falling off the wagon, Moretti’s clearly manic son)…but, the music isn’t all that much better, save the weird folk duo singing publicly-funded hospital standards like, “I Will Survive.” Classic.

I’m so glad Grey’s Anatomy is back into the swing of things this season. Even the music is better, wouldn’t you agree?

I read…somewhere…might have been Ask Ausiello, that two people who we wouldn’t have thought would hook up would, actually, hook up. So last night, CU and I were trying to pair everyone up. Hahn and Syph Nurse? Chief Webber and Callie? McDreamy and Webber? After all, one is already fixing breakfast for the other. Oh wait, what about Pretty and Prettier? Swear to God, that was one of the best scenes of the night, right up there with the events surrounding, “Did you only shave one of your legs?”

Our biggest unanswered question…are there really only three attendings at Seattle Grace? From Hahn’s tirade last night, that’s what you’d think. FYI for those of you getting ready to visit the beautiful Emerald City anytime soon…unless your ailments are of a neurological, cardiothoracic or…plasticky nature, you might want to take your business to Mercy West. “We used to have an ob/gyn attending. As a matter of fact, she was a world-class neonatal surgeon…but she left.” I mean for criminy’s sake, Chicago County General has three attendings just for the ER, including one who is just working until December to make enough money for a surf trip.

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It’s one thing to endure the next few weeks what with school and Christmas already breathing down my neck, but in my few spare moments - when I get the chance to read a little Michael Ausiello scoop…this is what I have to read?

Question: What’s going on with George and Izzie on Grey’s? Are they breaking up or not?! — Damian

Ausiello: I honestly don’t know what to believe anymore. After my interview with Shonda Rhimes at the Emmys, I thought for sure she was pulling the plug on this ill-conceived romance. But yesterday I got an unconfirmed tip that Gizzie is still alive and kicking in Episode 8. That’s right — 8! That means we’ve got at least five more weeks of these two! My mole also reports that in the same episode, Mer and Der are still going strong with their whole let’s-have-sex-but-not-be-super-serious thing.

EIGHT? Although really, George & Izzie’s relationship isn’t any more disturbing than this.

Want to know what I lovedlovedloved about last night’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy? Medical cases! Oodles of them! Remember back in Season Two, when we had fantastic storylines such as The Great Train Wreck and The Quints and Teen Hermaphrodites? Yeah I know, it’s a bit of a stretch for me too, since last season didn’t teach us much about medicine except you can stop a brain from hemorraghing on a ferry using nothing more than a drill from Home Depot, a dirty work shirt and a phone line with two attendings and a chief of surgery.

Having said that, it was FANTASTIC to see the show’s momentum back on the upswing with detached spines and detached arms and detached emotions, but VERY WEIRD to see Alex, Meredith, Cristina and Izzie as residents; as in, honest-to-God surgical doctors who have to teach other people. I loved how each of them channeled their inner Bailey and implemented her management techniques in his or her own unique way. And, Izzie brought a deer back to life! She couldn’t save Denny, but she could save Bambi…and I mean that in a completely non-George sort of way. Nothing can save George at this point.

Other than that, I won’t even address the George/Izzie storyline. You all know I loathe the two of them together, apart, whatever. They’re really sloppy and risky and gee, do you think someone’s going to find out about them soon? Me too. Seriously, I’m not going to address it..except the part about how the show undid 57 minutes of cheering and giggling and clapping with one sentence out of George’s mouth at the end of the show.

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Watching:
Survivor: China (okay, not a premiere but I’m still watching)
Grey’s Anatomy
ER

Recording:
My Name is Earl
The Office
Big Shots

Skipping:
Ugly Betty
CSI

Last night was Season Finale Thursday, my friends!

The Office

I cheered when Jim came back to Scranton and asked Pam if she was available for dinner (”Great…then it’s a date.”) and then I squealed when Corporate offered the Job Formerly Known As Jan’s to…Ryan. Did you stick around to the very end? If you didn’t, you missed the big call and Kelly’s subsequent out-of-body experience.

Everything will shift around next season, but I do wonder if they’ll bring Karen back at least to clean out her desk, since she has a new show on Fox this Fall and all.

Jan and her new boobs will be moving in with Michael after her erratic freak-out and subsequent firing (”Is it because of these????“), provided Michael can back out of the premature eBay sale of his condo (”It’ll probably affect my negative feedback.”). And, like Mike and Susan on Desperate Housewives, it looks like after three seasons, we’ll be able to watch Jim and Pam actually give their relationship a shot.

My favorite scene though, was when Michael came back from New York and told Ryan to get him a cup of coffee. Ryan’s response? “I don’t do that anymore.” Hee.

If anyone can find a Schrute Buck on the internets, let me know. There a few people I’d like to give them to. Special shout-out to Jenna Fischer (because she reads my blog, not)…get well soon!

Grey’s Anatomy

While I love hearing Jim and Pam talk about how they’re best friends and the fun they have, whenever I hear Izzie Stevens tell George he’s her best friend, a chill runs up my spine. Izzie has turned into this weird friendship stalker with crazy eyes who, a mere season ago (which was like, three months in GA time) was getting ready to marry Denny Duquette. Man, that girl sure does fall in and out of love easily…and quickly…and inappropriately.

The only thing I didn’t care for in last night’s finale was how they put everything, literally, into the last fifteen minutes. I’d read (and heard) from Shonda Rimes that this was going to have some big events but…Callie wants a baby? Really? If George actually thought that was a good idea, then I’m not surprised he failed his intern exam, because boyfriend’s common sense is sorely lacking.

I half-expected The Chief to have Bailey skip all tasks and go directly to the Chief of Surgery Pit Stop, but even the writers thought that was too incredulous an idea…so they gave the Chief Resident slot to Calliope Torres, who follows in the footsteps of the fine Drs. Mark Greene and Archie Morris.

The most surprising thing for me last night, was the discovery that Cristina’s been desperately unhappy and trapped during her entire relationship with Burke. At least, that was my interpretation. I’ve read in a couple other places she was flipping out because he was gone, but when I see someone yell “I’M FREE!” complete with Meredith cutting away the wedding gown, that just didn’t seem like remorse…it felt like relief. Thoughts? The worst part is still yet to come, however…when she wakes up the next day and realizes she may be free, but she still doesn’t have any real eyebrows. Now that’s a tragedy a girl just can’t get over in quick fashion.

Biggest non-surprise? Meredith’s half-sister showing up for her first day as an intern at Seattle Grace, all full of smiles and promise…what, two days after her mom’s funeral? Huh? With all the family bonding, Susan and Papa Grey never thought to mention their other daughter would be showing up in a week? Seriously? Nice touch in retrospect though, having Derek flirt with another Grey Girl at Joe’s the night before she began her intern year. Oh no…won’t be much drama between the intern, the resident and the neurosurgeon next season.

And…Shonda…yeah you…can you quit with everyone wearing black in the season finales? Oh, and for those of you keeping score at home, Season One finale…Derek & Meredith break up. Season Two finale, they get back togehter. Season Three finale, they sorta break up.

ER

The only parts of last night’s finale I actually watched (the rest is recorded) were the scenes between Neela and Ray. Oh, how my heart broke when the orderlies turned his wheelchair around and he’d lost both his legs. Because he’d been hit. By a truck. Listening to a voice mail from Neela. After kicking Gates’s ass. Because, Gates is an ass. And now, Ray’s on his way back to Baton Rouge with his mom. Please ER producers…give the guy new legs and bring him back to County one of these days.

And, I’m sorry, but was Neela getting trampled to death at the end?

**Spoilers below…BEWARE!**

Oh Shonda, I am so disapponted with you…couldn’t you have gone outside your formula just a bit when creating the new characters for Montgomery’s Anatomy?

Did you have to cast George O’Malley as Cooper, the befuddled pediatrician who carries a perma-torch for Violet, played by Izzie Stevens? I must say though, it was a clever casting move with Alex Karev as HIMSELF in twenty years. Kidding. UGH.

Let me say that again…UGH.

Now, I know I didn’t like Grey’s Anatomy at first, either…but to take Addison and Meredithify her…complete with the insanely LAME “talking elevator”…and then top it off with her desperation to have a baby because she needs “change” in her life (Hello! Worst reason ever to have a baby!)…let me say that again…UGH.

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Is it just me, or do the writers at Grey’s Anatomy seem to be stuck in a dark and twisty spiral of misery and agony? If you consider, according to the show’s alleged timeline, the characters haven’t even finished their first year of residency…here’s what they’ve dealt with:

• George’s dad dies
• Meredith’s Alzheimer’s-stricken mother lives, then dies
• Izzie’s fiancé dies
• Cristina miscarries
• Cristina & Burke get engaged
• George gets syphilis
• George sees Cristina naked at Burke’s apartment
• Meredith nearly drowns, dies, sees Bomb Guy & Denny, then comes back to life
• Meredith sees Bomb Guy blow up
• Meredith’s dog dies

I could go on and on…but last night’s episode was the capstone of the season in my opinion, because now Izzie’s adopted-out daughter Hannah has arrived at the Foremost and Apparently, Only Hospital In The Country with leukemia and her adoptive parents want Izzie to donate bone marrow. All together now…seriously?

We knew she’d eventually show up because, what would the point have been of Izzie confiding she had a daughter to Meredith last season? And of course, the daughter is beautiful, Izzie is verklempt, and George gets his first opportunity to put Izzie’s pants on, rather than take them off. Go team.

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Oh you Grey’s Anatomy folks…you’re so clever with your product non-placement.

Sooooo…how much do you all wanna bet Callie comes over to The House on the next episode and finds George in bed with Izzie? Then, we’d get to spend the rest of the season with the two of them insisting to everyone within earshot that Nothing Happened!

{rolling eyes}

I haven’t said, “No no no no no no no no noooooooooooooo” that much since the last time George hooked up with one of his roommates everyone knew he was hot for…except him. Look how well that turned out. For such a dork, he sure does get a lot of action.

In other news, Cardio God/McFossil arrives on the scene to make all the Attendings behave like morons, perform surgeries they shouldn’t, ignite rumors about the impending Chief Decision…and perform a little CPR on Cristina and Burke’s flatlining storyline…and pat Cristina’s ass. That McFossil…he’s a Renaissance man. And, formerly Cristina’s med school professor.

You see, when she was at Stanford, she had a three-year relationship with the guy. Now though…now she’s grown up and mature and has graduated from playing slap-and-tickle with her former superior to placating her new superior with a marriage ceremony and a white gown “if it will make him happy”. Insert face caress here.
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If you haven’t seen Grey’s yet tonight…don’t read past the jump…

But if you have…
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Geez…don’t the people who write these stories watch the show?

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) -

Taye Diggs will star opposite Kate Walsh in ABC’s potential spinoff from hit medical drama “Grey’s Anatomy.”

The show will test the waters as a back-door pilot, an expanded two-hour episode of “Grey’s” slated to air in May. It will center on neonatal surgeon Addison Shepherd (Walsh), a character who has enjoyed a strong following from fans since she was introduced at the end of the hot surgical drama’s first season.

I’m guessing Taye Diggs will play a guy who keeps getting the crap kicked out of him, then wakes up each day to do it all over again. That premise would keep everyone entertained for, oh, say, 2 or 3 episodes. Or, maybe he’ll be a Jamaican med school grad who, having been dumped by his girlfriend after ten years, takes his optometry practice to wherever McMontgomery is to mend his heart and learn the fine art of lasik.

Well if nothing else, we know they’re not killing off Addison this Thursday, since apparently…they’re spinning her off into her own show.

What do you all think WSJ stands for? I’ve got the West Seattle part…what about the J? Can’t be “jay-jay”.

Two days until the devastating conclusion to the most anticipated television event…EVER!

Do you think it’s any coincidence MereDITH sounds kinda like MereDEATH?

Discuss amongst yourselves.

Dylan…Dillon?

Holy crapoley, is Meredith dead? I know, lame way to start a post.

Sure, the show is called Grey’s Anatomy…but if you’ve read the blogcaps for the last couple of years, or listened to the Official iTunes Grey’s Anatomy Podcast every Friday (“I’m Shonda Rhimes…and I’m Betsy Beers…and we’re…GREY’S ANATOMY!”), it really doesn’t seem like too far-fetched of an idea.

I was talking to my mom last night when the show ended (she’s still in denial about Denny’s death, by the way) and while she went the direction of, “But the show’s all about her!” - I went the other direction. Meredith Grey has done an amazing job, if you think about it, in affecting every single person’s life on the show just by her existence. She’s Cristina’s “person”, for crying out loud.
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I’m really not in the right frame of mind to discuss Grey’s Anatomy right now…so we’ll shoot for tomorrow.

I’m beginning to wonder if my theory about Mere and Mama Ellis winding up in the same home isn’t as far-fetched as it seemed last week.

Turns out, the nerds and copycats are prevailing on Survivor: Shark Jump Island this season! Who’da thunk it? We watched the first half of the show and taped My Name Is Earl, and boy am I glad we did, because I got to see Bahston Rahcky and “Boo” and for some reason, this is the season of the “nickname”. I literally laughed out loud when Jeffy told Bahston Rahcky to “Just pick one” when smahrt-ass Rahcky said he had lots of nicknames.

Sadly, The Architect, who divvied up the teams, was the first one to head to Exiled Snake Island…and…that’s when we flipped over to The Office, where we finally got to see Phyllis and Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration get married at…Pam’s wedding. That’s right. Everything from the food (”I sent the chicken back.” “That was fish.”) to the colors to the wedding dress to the flowers to the invitations to the band (yay! Scrantonicity!) was the same as Pam had planned for her wedding with Roy.

And…how awesome was Roy last night? I was gunning for Pam and Jim all last season because Roy was an overstuffed wad, but this year…Roy’s a changed man. He likes Pam’s art, he admits he wasn’t “there” during the planning…then he slips the band a twenty to play “their” song. That’s awesome…and the look on Jim’s face when Pam & Roy left the reception hand in hand? Priceless.

THEN…I flip over to Grey’s Anatomy, and a ferry catches on fire in Seattle, because it has been hit by a cargo boat. In retrospect, this is frighteningly ironic because when CU and I were floating over to Bainbridge Island, I saw a cargo boat in the distance and said to him, “I hope that doesn’t hit us. That would suck.” No joke. You can ask him.

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It must be February, because in February, bombs seem to drop (literally, last year) around Seattle Grace. If you haven’t seen last night’s episode…don’t read any further…

But if you did, did I totally call this or what?

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I watched last Thursday’s Grey’s Anatomy again, because last season I watched every episode six times and this season…well this season, I only watch them once. I’m realizing I’m missing out on so much.

Like, for example, the huge pink-elephant-in-the-room reason why Callie can not possibly accept George’s marriage proposal: if she chose to relinquish her maiden name, she would be Callie O’Malley. By galley.

That just can’t happen. It’s all way too Julia Guglia.

Leave it to SAG award winner Chandra Wilson to up the ante on her list of memorable quotes. Along the now-classic Baileyisms of “Quit looking at my VA-JAY-JAY” and “Where. Are. My. Suckups?”, we now have this to add to our arsenal:

“It’s about those 10 cast members sitting over there and the other one in rehab. Y’all just hold me together.”

The other one in rehab. Heh. Note she didn’t say “Isaiah Washington”…it was “the other one in rehab.” Would have been great had she said, “It’s about those 10 cast members sitting over there and the other one, who will be a ‘ripped from the headlines’ storyline for May sweeps. Expect Dr. Burke to ‘out’ Nurse Syph while tending to disaster victims after a freak sharp downburst wind breaks the Space Needle in half.”

In other SAG awards news…color me giddy to see The Office win for best comedy ensemble and Grey’s Anatomy for best drama ensemble. My only true disappointment is the fact that neither Forrest Whitaker nor Helen Mirren are listed on Fafarazzi. How am I supposed to get points for their inevitable Oscar nods if they’re not on the list? Seriously.

You know how sometimes you look through old photo albums, and you find a picture of yourself doing something which at the time seemed like no big deal, but now is really embarrassing?

Here’s the blogosphere’s equivalent of that. Oh what a difference a couple of years makes.

Rediscovering all of my old blog posts is a double-edged sword…I get to see all the really cool things I’d sort of forgotten I’d documented, but then I also find things like recaps of North Shore & Joe Schmo 2.

Yes…I said North Shore.

CU and I made it into Seattle last night, after a rather bumpy but otherwise uneventful flight in. On our descent, it was completely cloudy, but we were able to see the majesty that is Mt. Rainier off to the left of the plane, sticking up through the clouds. We enjoyed it while we could, since we probably won’t see it again until next Tuesday morning on the way out.

When we were stuck in rush hour traffic travelling north on our way to the hotel I asked CU, “I wonder if Dr. Addison Montgomery has to sit in this traffic like everyone else?” When what to my wondering eyes should appear…on Grey’s last night, we saw Addison coming into town on the ferry. So she doesn’t have to sit in freeway traffic…she just has to sit in ferry traffic. Question answered.

We have a big day of wine tasting and relaxation planned. It is so nice to be out of Dallas…I can’t even begin to tell you.

Well, the poo hit the fan last night on Grey’s Anatomy, in what I would say was the least festive episode of the show ever. The events which unfolded were reminiscient of A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. It certainly wasn’t last Thanksgiving’s warm & fuzzy “They Call Me PRESTON Burke” show.

Everything went wrong, everyone was betrayed, Izzie couldn’t seem to keep her big mouth shut (which part of Bailey’s instructions are unclear?), Addison & Alex shared a really weird flirtation and Cristina finally came clean on the 3,547 unethical things she and Burke have done since he was cleared for surgery. Funny, I think if the two of them actually robbed a bank, that would still wind up being the least of their problems.

All we needed was Mrs. Chief to show up, hands on hips, exclaiming, “Where’s the turkey, Chuck? Where’s the mashed potatoes?”

And is it just me, or is every woman on that show contractually obligated to have fantastic hair? All we saw of Dr. Hahn last season was her competitive, big mouth and a variety of surgical caps during Iron Surgeon: America (”Welcome to Surgery Stadium! The Chairman has decided today’s secret surgery is…cardiomyopicardoditisectomy!” ) last season then all of a sudden…she has flowing, wavy hair and is spouting off wisdom to Cristina while Blackberrying something back to the mother ship. Huh?

I do have a serious question…for you fellow eagle-eye viewers…when Cristina showed up at Burke’s apartment at the end, before he slammed the door in her face, I saw a framed photo of a blonde on a nightstand…who was that? It kinda…sorta…looked like…Dr. Hahn. That would be perfect - Johns Hopkins arch-rivals by day, bedmates by night.